poesia: giro

Here’s is the English version of this poem:

Poetry: Crooked Turn

otro giro equivocado mΓ‘s en el amor y perderΓ© la fe para siempre
porque siguiendo repetir la misma tragedia
es una locura que estΓ‘ acabando con mi espΓ­ritu, con mi alma
mejor serΓ­a quedarme sola que seguir perdiendo partes de mi
por mi anhelo de ser amada

poesΓ­a: luz

Here is the English version of this poem:

Poetry: Memory

fuistes la luz mΓ‘s brillante en mi universo de amor
quizΓ‘s por eso pasan los aΓ±os y no llegΓ³ a olvidarte
quizΓ‘s por eso siempre regreso a ti para que me acuerde
que el amor no siempre es una mierda que se repite
cada vez que me enamoro

Poetry: Recovery

I wrote this poem in August of 2022.

Insecurities and anxiety from my immigrant childhood
Come out to play and my adult self wants to run away
I thought I was healed from this
I hate these triggers—but I still confront them even if I don’t want to
I cry and write about them, reprocess something not quite healed
Am I on the way to my recovery from BPD?

Poetry: Cage

I wrote this poem in August of 2022.

love makes me feel trapped
trapped in a cage of desire and emotions
that I want to escape from
and I still try thinking this time
it will be different except it never is
so I’m giving up for a while-
Giving myself time to prepare for my next victim

poesia: Queridisimo Brad

here is the English version of this poem:

Poetry: Dear Brad

Queridisimo Brad-
lo siento por no dejar que me lleves a tu cama
y que me uses como te dΓ© la gana
es que aprendi mi leccion
y ahora entendiΓ³ que soy un tesoro
que no puede gastar su energΓ­a
en alguien que no mas me quiere
por un ratito y despues se va

Poetry: 5 AM

I wrote this poem in August of 2022.

At 5 am, I woke up and wrote a 4 page poem
about how I wasn’t enough and proceeded to crash my car
and my therapist asked if I wanted to die-
And I was like β€œnah, I just couldn’t reign my impulsivity in”
at least this time I got control of the car and didn’t fuck
anyone else up

Poetry: Rain in August

I wrote this poem in August of 2022.

in August in my depressive era

The rain falls steadily in August
and I feel a sense of dread, a sense of hopelessness
and I want to dwell on everything I lack,
on everything I’m a failure at-
But I stop myself because while sadness has served as inspiration
and has a place in my mind and life
I can’t allow it to take over my life and consume me
because this is not my whole story
I’m more than being sad and angry

poesia: Juego

here is the english version of this poem:

Poetry: Stupid Game

Maldita sea este juego de amor
me siento un peΓ³n sin poder, sin control
y no importa lo que hago
siempre pierdo mi cabeza y mi alma
siempre pierdo mi razon y mi corazΓ³n
y terminΓ³ destrozada y lastimada
por ser terca y estΓΊpida y siempre perder

Salma and Sylvia

Daily writing prompt
How would you describe yourself to someone?

sometimes I am Salma,
Sexy, alluring, playful
and a world of fun

Sometimes I am Sylvia
Angry, frustrated, contemplative
and fascinated with death

It depends on who I’m with
and which woman they inspire me to be
I want to find someone I can be both with
A man who loves both the Salma and Sylvia in me

poetry: distraction

Aqui esta la version en espanol:

Poesia: Adios

I keep my screams and cries inside for the sake of my pride
I’ll pretend I’m happy and fine
even as waves of infinite grief wash over me
and I’m drenched in humiliation and shame
for allowing myself to become the pawn in a game
played by another guy who’s only looking for a temporary distraction

Poetry: Temporary Destination

Aqui esta la version en Espanol:

Poesia: Algo Pasajero

I’m more than a temporary destination for men to lay their love in
I will no longer lay down and play princess
and adjust and accommodate to their egos and needs
when they can never make me a priority
when they can never acknowledge my humanity
from now I won’t allow anyone near me
unless they show themselves worthy of my time and energy

poetry:magic

Aqui esta la version en espaΓ±ol:

Poesia: PodrΓ­a Ser

I’m not the woman of your dreams or the woman you’ll worship as a deity
or the woman who accommodates and bends according to your needs
but I’m the woman who’ll haunt you with the β€œwhat ifs”,
I’m the woman who’ll fuel your creativity,
I’m the woman who’ll make you believe magics exists

Poetry: Insecure

Aqui esta la version en espaΓ±ol :

Poesia: Demaciado Sencilla

you told me I’m not wife material
so you dropped me like I was nothing
but not before you took me to your bed a few times
but not before filling my head with the illusion
that you wanted a future with me-
Are you sick in the head?
Is this how you always operate?
Finding an insecure girl to get your primal needs met
and later on dropping them like a bad habit