I wrote this poem in August of 2025.

from L.A burning to alligator alcatraz to sydney sweeney
to hash browns
this has been the strangest summer
Doing a 31 day prompt challenge. The prompt was “Where Flowers Bloom 💐

I wrote this poem in August of 2022.

My love data tells me I shouldn’t try again because every time
I crash and burn and cause trauma and drama
because every time it ends, I get hateful and want revenge
and While I do appreciate the poetry that comes
after every broken relationship
I don’t think I can withstand the heartbreak and devastation
the next time it ends
The Science Behind Mood Swings in Borderline Personality Disorder by Sara from Mind Align Psychiatry

Understanding Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) requires a transition away from outdated misconceptions and toward a sophisticated appreciation of the biological and psychological mechanisms that orchestrate the human experience. At the epicenter of this disorder lies affective instability, a phenomenon commonly categorized as mood swings. It is vital to recognize that these fluctuations are not mere expressions of a temperamental disposition or manifestations of willful behavior. Rather, they are the profound result of intricate, cascading interactions within the brain, specifically involving the neural circuits responsible for emotional regulation and impulse control. By conducting a deep analysis of the neurobiology and the psychological frameworks that govern these rapid shifts, we can attain a much clearer, more compassionate perspective on why they manifest and the specific ways in which they can be mitigated through evidence-based practice.
To fully grasp the intense nature of mood swings in the context of BPD, one must first examine the specific neurological structures that govern emotional processing. The limbic system, frequently described as the emotional command center of the human brain, occupies a primary role in this dynamic. In individuals living with BPD, this system often demonstrates a state of profound and persistent hyper-reactivity.
At the center of this reactivity is the amygdala, a small, almond-shaped structure tasked with functioning as the brain’s primary alarm system. Its evolutionarily ancient role is to detect environmental threats and initiate the physiological fight-or-flight response. Scientific research consistently indicates that the amygdala in those with BPD is exceptionally sensitive. This signifies that even neutral stimuli or mildly stressful interpersonal exchanges can be perceived by the brain as significant existential threats. This misinterpretation triggers an immediate, overwhelming, and highly intense emotional reaction before the higher-order brain centers have the opportunity to analyze the situation objectively.
Simultaneously, the prefrontal cortex—situated at the very front of the brain—is responsible for executive functions, including complex reasoning, long-term planning, and the regulation of volatile emotions. Under optimal conditions, the prefrontal cortex exerts top-down control over the amygdala, allowing an individual to perform a reality check before responding. However, in BPD, the neurological communication pathway between the prefrontal cortex and the amygdala is frequently compromised. The regulating brake of the prefrontal cortex often lacks the necessary strength to successfully dampen the rapid, surging accelerator of the amygdala. Consequently, emotions spike with extreme velocity and remain elevated for significantly longer durations than they would in neurotypical individuals. This systemic disconnect is a foundational biological pillar that drives the frequency and severity of BPD-related mood swings.
While the biological infrastructure provides the underlying capacity for emotional volatility, ingrained cognitive patterns and specific environmental triggers serve as the immediate catalysts for these shifts. A central psychological concept in the study of BPD is the mechanism of splitting, often referred to as black-and-white thinking. This cognitive bias forces the individual to process the world, other people, and their own sense of self into rigid, mutually exclusive categories of either “all good” or “all bad.”
When an individual experiences a perceived sign of rejection, failure, or criticism, this black-and-white lens intensifies the resulting emotional impact exponentially. If someone living with BPD interprets a delayed text message or a slightly blunt tone of voice as a definitive sign of abandonment, the amygdala initiates a fight-or-flight response, and the thought process pivots instantly toward the “all bad” extreme. Because there is no nuanced middle ground within this cognitive framework, the transition from feeling secure and attached to feeling entirely devastated occurs in a matter of seconds.
These shifts are further exacerbated by an extreme sensitivity to subtle social cues. Research suggests that the BPD brain is uniquely attuned to the minutiae of human interaction. Minor changes in facial expressions, shifts in body language, or variations in vocal tone are often magnified, leading to a state of heightened hypervigilance. The brain essentially works overtime to scan the environment for evidence of impending abandonment, which unfortunately creates a self-fulfilling cycle. In this state, the desperate attempt to avoid pain ends up triggering the very emotional instability that threatens the stability of important relationships. This level of sensitivity is not a deficit of character; it is a neurological state of constant high alert that makes the process of emotional regulation a monumental, exhausting endeavor.
It is impossible to conduct a thorough analysis of the science of BPD without acknowledging the crucial intersection of biological predisposition and environmental history. The prevailing scientific consensus is established through the biosocial model, which posits that BPD emerges from a complex interaction between a child’s innate biological vulnerability and a long-term invalidating environment.
Biological vulnerability refers to a natural temperament characterized by heightened emotional sensitivity, extreme emotional intensity, and a notably slow return to an emotional baseline after being triggered. When a child possessing this specific temperament is raised in an environment that consistently invalidates, dismisses, or punishes their internal emotional experiences, they often fail to acquire the foundational skills necessary to label, manage, or self-soothe their emotions effectively.
Invalidation manifests when a person’s authentic internal experiences are disregarded or trivialized as being “dramatic” or “unfounded.” Over time, the child internalizes the message that their internal signals are incorrect or unacceptable. As they progress into adulthood, this historical lack of self-validation makes it profoundly difficult to regulate mood swings independently. The brain effectively remains stuck in a developmental state where emotions are experienced as external, uncontrollable, and dangerous forces rather than manageable, internal occurrences. This history of chronic invalidation reinforces the brain’s inability to calm itself, as the neural pathways required for effective self-soothing were never given the chance to develop or strengthen during critical developmental years.
The science behind BPD is not a permanent sentence of unavoidable suffering. The concept of neuroplasticity—the brain’s inherent ability to reorganize its structure by forming new, healthier neural connections—provides a scientifically supported path toward increased stability. Modern therapeutic interventions are explicitly designed to physically alter how the brain processes, interprets, and reacts to emotional stimuli.
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) serves as the gold standard for clinical treatment in BPD. It focuses on teaching concrete, actionable skills across four primary modules: mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotion regulation, and interpersonal effectiveness. Through the consistent and repeated application of these skills, patients help strengthen the prefrontal cortex’s functional ability to exert influence over the amygdala. In a sense, the consistent application of DBT acts as a form of neuro-physical therapy, training the brain to shift from impulsive bottom-up reactivity to measured, top-down regulation.
Beyond traditional clinical settings, some individuals find supplemental support through digital resources or the guidance of a virtual psychiatrist to facilitate consistent access to cognitive behavioral exercises. While personalized, face-to-face professional guidance remains the most potent tool, the core of long-term recovery resides in the diligent, consistent internal work of recognizing, labeling, and mitigating emotional surges as they arise. By maintaining consistency in therapy and prioritizing lifestyle habits like structured sleep hygiene and active stress management, the nervous system can eventually transition from a state of exhausting hypervigilance to one of sustainable calm.
The emotional fluctuations associated with Borderline Personality Disorder are deeply embedded within the complex architecture of the brain and the nuanced interplay of an individual’s life history. By viewing these behavioral challenges through a rigorous scientific lens, we have the opportunity to replace the weight of stigma with the light of empathy, and the confusion of uncertainty with the clarity of clinical understanding. The hyper-reactivity of the limbic system, the rigid cognitive distortions of black-and-white thinking, and the cumulative impact of chronic environmental invalidation all converge to produce the intense emotional shifts that define this experience.
It is critical to understand that recovery is not only possible but is a demonstrated reality for countless individuals who commit to the process. This journey begins with the fundamental acknowledgement that emotional regulation is not an innate talent, but rather a functional skill that can be developed and refined over time. As scientific research continues to advance our knowledge of the neurobiology of personality, our capacity to provide targeted, effective, and compassionate support will only continue to grow.

How to Pursue Your Self-Improvement Goals Without Burning Out by Dean Burgess
Self-improvement is the ongoing process of building healthier habits, learning new skills, and making intentional changes that help you grow over time. While personal development can improve confidence, relationships, and career opportunities, it can also become exhausting if you constantly chase perfection instead of sustainable progress.
Many people begin with enthusiasm only to lose momentum after setting unrealistic expectations. The good news is that meaningful growth doesn’t require constant hustle. A balanced approach helps you improve while protecting your mental and physical well-being.
Burnout often develops when every area of life becomes another project to optimize. Reading dozens of books, following countless productivity influencers, or trying multiple new routines simultaneously may feel productive at first, but it can quickly become overwhelming.
A healthier approach follows a simple pattern:
Problem: Trying to improve everything at once creates stress and inconsistency.
Solution: Prioritize a few meaningful goals and build sustainable habits around them.
Result: You make steady progress without sacrificing your energy or enjoyment of life.
Instead of asking, “How can I become my best self this month?” ask, “What small improvement will still matter a year from now?”
Large ambitions are exciting, but daily actions produce lasting results. Rather than overhauling your entire routine, identify habits that are realistic enough to maintain during busy weeks.
For example:
These habits may appear modest, yet they compound into meaningful improvements over months and years.
Education can be an excellent part of a personal development plan, especially if you’re preparing for a career change or pursuing advancement in your current profession. Many people now choose online learning because it offers greater flexibility around work and family responsibilities. Today’s online programs cover a wide range of fields, and healthcare professionals have specialized pathways as well—for example, registered nurses can pursue online coursework toward a Bachelor of Science in Nursing (BSN). If you’re comparing programs, a neat overview can help explain what to expect from an RN-to-BSN option and how it may fit into your long-term goals.
Before adding another goal to your list, ask yourself:
Answering “yes” to most of these questions usually indicates you’re pursuing growth at a sustainable pace.
Balance Your Ambition With Recovery
Improvement doesn’t happen only while you’re working. It also happens while you’re recovering.
Sleep, hobbies, downtime, and meaningful relationships all contribute to better decision-making, creativity, and resilience. Taking breaks isn’t a sign that you’ve lost motivation—it helps you maintain it.
One useful habit is scheduling recovery with the same intention as productive work. A quiet evening, an afternoon outdoors, or simply disconnecting from your phone for a while can make it easier to return to your goals with renewed focus.
| Healthy Personal Development | Burnout-Prone Approach |
| Sets a few clear priorities | Tries to improve everything simultaneously |
| Builds gradual habits | Depends on constant motivation |
| Celebrates consistent effort | Focuses only on major achievements |
| Includes regular rest | Feels guilty about taking breaks |
| Adjusts goals when circumstances change | Pushes forward regardless of stress |
If you’re interested in learning more about building lasting habits, James Clear’s Atomic Habits resources offer practical, research-informed ideas about creating systems that encourage consistent improvement rather than relying on willpower alone. You can explore articles and free resources at:
The emphasis on making small, repeatable changes complements a balanced approach to personal development and can help you stay motivated without feeling overwhelmed.
Common signs include constant fatigue, losing interest in activities you once enjoyed, difficulty concentrating, irritability, and feeling guilty whenever you rest. If your pursuit of improvement consistently leaves you exhausted instead of energized, it’s worth slowing down and reassessing your goals.
Absolutely. Concentrating on a single meaningful objective often produces better long-term results than dividing your attention across many unrelated goals. Once one habit becomes routine, you can gradually introduce another.
Missing a few days is normal. The important thing is returning to your routine without treating temporary setbacks as failure. Consistency over months matters far more than maintaining a perfect streak.
Yes. Mentors, teachers, coaches, therapists, and supportive friends can all contribute to personal growth. Seeking guidance is often a sign of commitment rather than weakness.

Personal development works best when it supports your life instead of taking it over. Sustainable habits, realistic expectations, and regular recovery create a foundation for meaningful progress that lasts. Rather than chasing perfection, focus on becoming slightly better than you were yesterday. Over time, those small improvements add up to lasting change.
I wrote this poem in July of 2025.

People watching days are over, this Song era is now my reality
no more longing or yearning over what could have been
or what I once upon a time wanted it to be
instead I focus on the genuine and loving connection in front of me
the one who’s not afraid of the creative beast who resides in me
and makes me feel heard and seen
even if sometimes that seems cringe or weird
Especially after I admitted I had watched him while he slept
this time he allows me to him without flinching
when I tell him he’s the new muse of my poetry
and he’s brave enough to share his feelings without shame
and reminds me of all the things he likes about me
the one who feels like my sanctuary to lay my love and poetry in
I wrote this poem in July of 2025.

my childhood was not easy and at times full of chaos
good to inspire my creativity, one where I never needed
much imagination
since real life served up a lot of telenovela energy
from toxic family dynamics to immigrant trauma
to the ghetto melrose place in hawaii
my childhood felt like a constant barrage of episodes
where the adults couldn’t keep it together
I wrote this poem in July of 2022.

I’m paid less than everyone according to the statistics
and it’s simply because of my ethnicity and gender
at times I get mad about this
but then I’m like, it is what it is
and won’t change in the near future
instead I continue to work hard for my and my kids betterment
and try my best to live out my immigrant dream
I wrote this poem in July of 2022.

As a child I naively thought america was the land of the free
it’s the greatest myth sold to everyone
especially to immigrants
as an adult, I found out the truth
American is the land of the free-
but you have to meet certain conditions
1)you have to be white
2)you have to christian
3)you have to be male
and now that I found out about the conditional freedom of America
I’m no longer shocked by its many atrocities
This is a poem I wrote in July. I was angry when I wrote it. Lol.

celebrating a country that rips babies apart from their parents
and takes away rights from the marginalized
and makes anyone who’s not white and christian feel unwelcome
feels like the cruelest irony
it’s celebrating genocide, racism, prejudice, xenophobia, and white supremacy
it’s celebrating everything atrocious and wrong about this country
it almost feels like a personal violation of my beliefs
to celebrate the hypocrisy of this country
founded on genocide and slavery
who claims liberty and justice for all
but “all” is really white, christian and male
so I’m passing on this year’s 4th of July celebrations
because except for a small portion of Americans
no one can claim true freedom
or independence in this American Land
What’s the best way to deal with negative thoughts?
On the days when I feel like a complete failure cause I got like 3 or 4 rejection emails for my poems and my bank account is almost in the negative. I do a couple of things.


Or I write a list of new goals and manifestations.

I also remind myself that bad days are inevitable and temporary. Try to remind myself how much progress I’ve had the past 10 years and I’ve been through worst times and made it through the other side. Also, at the very least, I will have gotten inspiration for a new poem so, technically I still win. I also remind myself that rejection and failure are part of the process and have also been my greatest lessons.
I wrote this poem in June of 2022.

I”m a complete disaster when it comes to love, well, romantic love
but I’m great at other kinds of love
Loving my children, adoring my friends, worshiping my parents
and of course filling myself with self love
but still I wonder if somewhere in this big wide world
exist an almost ideal lover
who’ll bring out my best and love me at my worse
who won’t put me on a pedestal
and doesn’t scare easily and leave
when he sees all of me