poesΓ­a: calladita

escribΓ­ este poema en marzo del 2022.

Calladita calladita me quedo siempre
para no molestar a mami que viene cansada segundo trabajo
soy una chica que me trago mis palabras
acerca del chico que me pellizcΓ³ el trasero
aunque me siento sucia
no quiero que mami piense que
hice algo malo para que me falten el respeto
soy una seΓ±orita de una buena familia
calladita calladita escondo mis libras de mΓ‘s
bajo los Blue Jeans anchos de mi hermano
ni siquiera le mencionΓ³ a mi madre que hace meses
no me baja la regla

PoesΓ­a: EscΓ‘ndalo!

EscribΓ­ este poema en marzo de 2022.

Que Escandalo!

Soy el escΓ‘ndalo de mi generaciΓ³n
marcho a mi ritmo propio desordenado
sin pensar quΓ© es lo correcto o moral
soy una mujer cachonda y alegre
que le gusta una variedad de amantes
porque la vida es demasiado corta
para seguir siendo una niΓ±a buena
soy una mujer caΓ³tica siempre actuando
sin pensamientos a las consecuencias
soy una mujer que ahora se arriesga
a vivir su vida con ganas y autenticidad

poetry: 2012

I wrote this poem in March of 2025.

in total darkness I fell for a while
for a year I didn’t listen to music
For a year I don’t remember being a mom
and while I still function and went to work
Several years later
I realize how I had forgotten all about
the darkness I had fallen in a while ago
my mind blocked it in an attempt to move on
in an attempt to heal

Poetry: Daydreaming about America

I wrote this in March of 2022.

Sept of 1986-me blowing out a candle right before me and my family started our immigration journey-my aunt had a goodbye party for us

When I was little, I was often lost in daydreams
about America
It was beautiful and blue
I pictured a celestial and warm ocean
where the waves tenderly touch my toes
I was taught it was a better existence than
the one we were living in
but no one told me that dreams sometimes
don’t come true
and the reality of America was filled with a hardness
that even 35 years later I’m still processing
indentured servitude, exploitation, depression,
addiction,racism, mental illness were just a few side effects
of going for the American dream

poetry: bossy

I wrote this poem in March of 2021.

I don’t want to but have to be the boss
the boss of my family
the boss in my relationships
the boss of my life
it sucks to take charge and dominate all of the spaces
it sucks to have so many responsibilities thrust upon me
it sucks to always have to shrink myself for egos
it sucks to never be in a space where for once
I can be soft

poetry: alien

I wrote this poem in March of 2021.

feeling my otherness feels like a full time job
not belonging to here or there
constantly in limbo wondering β€œwhere is my home?
they hate me here, they hate me there
I don’t belong anywhere but I remain here
it’s the only home I’ve ever known
America
home of the free, home of the brave
but never my HOME!

poetry: sentencing

I wrote this poem in March of 2025.

this book is a mindfuck

flickering ashes, among them, the bride’s dress
dreams of a family
dreams of a white picket fence all went up in smoke
jilted and pregnant
bride cries on the floor, waiting for the sentencing
from her parents
now that her lover jilted her
and couldn’t make an honest woman out of her

poetry: cesspool

I wrote this poem in March of 2019.

Feeling hopeless in a cesspool of a world
That will never accept you
-for your skin color
-for your accent
-for your nationality
-for your religion or lack of one
-for your independent thought
Anything that doesn’t fit the image
of white and Christian is blasphemous
To be an β€œother” is to carry the weight of racism,
discrimination, xenophobia
All the phobias on your already burdened shoulders
So they try to kill us with actual guns Or
metaphorical ones of insults,rejections or looks of disgust.

poetry: soldier

I wrote this poem in February of 2023.

I’m soldier of love
too lost battles for me to count and recount
how many times I’ve had to stitch my heart over and over again
from the many knives past lovers have stabbed me with
with the last one, I almost lost all hope for love
It made me lose my sanity and almost gave me PTSD
Still the romantic in me refused to die
and resurfaced this year
Told me, β€œthis time it will be different, this time you have self respect
and you’ll be choosy over who’s worthy of your love energy”

poetry: second chance

I wrote this poem in February of 2025.

raindrops serendipiciously hit the window panes of our room
and the wind sings a song everyone can hear
I lay on your chest in our bed in awe of what just happened
caught lovestruck with a smile of love
thankful for this second chance at marriage
for so long I thought I was doomed to be alone
never expected to find you
especially the way you showed up in my life
and now there isn’t a space between us
and you look at me with goofy smile of yours
the one that inspires the poet in me and say
β€œwe need to make up for lost time”