Melia Cogan has done it again with her second poetry collection. She paints a picture of the beauty of love and the euphoria it brings to one’s life. This book will make you weak at your knees and perhaps even want to get you on a dating app to look for that special someone to experience the magic of love. Cogan explores the mosaic of emotions that come with love. Through Cogan’s verse, I was transported to the alluring and sometimes tumultuous journey of love.
I’ll talk about my 2 favorite poems from the poetry collection.
One of the poems that really resonated with me was “Should I Allow Myself”. I liked how profound this poem is-it speaks about allowing yourself to fall in love recklessly while risking your vulnerability. It’s risking everything to be in the moment of that special memory of love. This is presented in the lines “Together/the possibilities/reach for me in the night/and primarily/I wish they were you (Cogan)”. It’s a desire for longing to be with that special someone.
The other poem that I really related to was “I’m Hiding from Love”because that’s kind of where I’m at right now. This is captured in the lines “Well. I enjoy my boat not toppling over in the sea/and my house not catching on fire (Cogan). Cogan is perceptive of what heartbreak feels like and how some of us are so burned by it,we’ll avoid it at all costs. The metaphors of the boat and fire feel like a truth I’ve encountered many times. It’s how anger and sorrow makes me feel like I’m either drowning or burning inside when it comes to heartbreak. Cogan captures these strong emotions in an intelligent and creative way that I’m sure resonates with mine and others’ experiences with the agony and torment that grief from heartbreak can bring.
I would recommend this poetry collection if you like to explore the depths of love and the complex emotions that come with it.
So here is a short anecdote before I start my review and how I ended up buying “Loving Her”. In late February, my bank was merging with another bank and the bank had issued me a new debit card but I was confused as to when it would be active. I was still using my old debit card and wanted to check if it was still working and of course decided to buy something off Amazon to do it. I already had “Loving Her” on my Wishlist and in true BPD impulsivity I bought it within a few minutes. I didn’t read the reviews or much about it. I just knew it was a poetry book about love and that seemed like a good reason to buy it. And after reading it, I can say that this is one of those times my BPD impulsivity really worked for me because I really enjoyed this book.
Timothy Robare’s Poetry collection “ Loving Her” really resonated with me in various ways . When I first started reading this book, I thought wow, the next guy I get serious about is getting a copy of this book to understand how a woman wants to be loved. Dudes ,take my advice, if you want to understand women, pick up this book and read it. . What I loved about this book is how Robare offers a unique and raw openness by sharing his experiences with love in this book. He reveals a complicated story of the turmoil and miracle that love can be and feel like. Reading this felt like reading a journal filled with Robare’s most private and intimate thoughts about love. This book is divided into 6 sections which are: “How I Want to Love Her”, “How I Do Love Her”, “How I Cannot Love Her”, “How I Did Love Her”, “How I Learned to Love Her”, and “Elizabeth”. I will talk about a poem or 2 poems from each section that really impacted me.
The first section “How I Want to Love Her” is exactly what the title of the section implies. Reading the poetry from this section made me think, “Hmm, I want to be loved like that.” One poem that really spoke to me was Curves and Crashes because of how Robare expresses his feelings for his partner in a way that made my jaded black heart almost melt. This is presented in the lines “She is not perfect, I never wanted perfect/I only want all that she is” (Robare) really shocked me because I thought “Damn, that there are men in this day and age who can express their feelings for their partners in such a beautiful way”.
In the second section, “How I Do Love Her”, Robare covers poetry about conflicting feelings about love. A poem that resonated with me was Carver-Robare speaks with passion about the juxtaposition of feelings love can bring. This is shown with the first few lines “She cuts smiles into my face/Carves sorrow into my heart/ Love is death” (Robare). I relate to the anxiety I have felt when my partner brought me love along with pain. It’s a complicated and uneasy emotion to deal with but Robare presents this feeling in an accurate way. Another poem I related to in this section is Jealous . This poem talks about the powerful and intense feelings that jealousy can bring. This is presented in the lines- “He looks at her/I want to vaporize him” (Robare). Oh man, I’ve felt that many times in relationships. It could be an unhealthy way to be possessive over someone but it’s just how it is or has been for some of us.
In the third section “How I Cannot Love Her” deals with anxiety and conflict felt during a relationship. The poem that I related to was Lightning Crashes. It that talks about how chemistry can come into play when resolving a conflict. This is shown in the lines, “Tears fell down like lightning/ Apologies constantly following thunder/Lips struck like matches/ catching my heart on fire/every time” (Robare). This reminded me of being with one particular partner who I would constantly fight with. I would get so mad at him that I wanted to punch him but then he would kiss me and well the fight would stop. With him, it was like one touch on my hand or a kiss and I was breathless with desire. Robare did an outstanding job presenting this sentiment. Another poem I liked from this section was Run. It’s a poem about the anxiety you have when you don’t feel good enough for your partner. This is presented in the lines “I need to run/ So I don’t hurt her, Don’t let her down/That’s what I’m good at after all” (Robare). There have been so many times I’ve had this feeling in relationships and I asked myself questions or had thoughts like “What does he see in me?”, “ I don’t deserve someone as good as him” and “How long will it be before he leaves me?” It’s a dark and scary place to be and Robare expresses this in a very honest and vulnerable way.
The fourth section “How I did love her” talks more of the complexities of love. I love the poem Whole Eyes because it shows how spell binding falling in love can feel like. The lines “Her damn mesmerizing eyes/For once I felt home/ the home I’ve always craved” (Robare). When I fall in love, that’s how it feels like for me, that person feels like a home I want to forever reside in. It’s a lovely feeling to feel like you have someone to call home. The other poem from this section that I liked was Broken Bones because of the raw and intense way Robare explained the pain of a breakup with the lines “She reached in me/Somewhere I can’t explain/ pull something out/ with a catastrophic pain” (Robare) It’s a feeling I know too well. A breakup to me feels like a pain so terrible , it’s a catastrophe in my world. I admire Robare for not shying away from talking about the intensity of grief that is felt because of a breakup.
The fifth section, “How she taught me to love” presents the positive side of love. I like the poem Unwavering because it talks about a “secure kind of love”. The lines “She began to build me up/Higher than I had ever risen”. It’s incredible how the right partner can build you in a way that ‘s empowering. Another poem I loved from this section was Extinction which presents how wonderful love can be. The lines “I know we aren’t perfect, not even close/ But it is a small glimpse of perfection” (Robare) Being with a good partner can feel like that. The world falls away while you’re consumed by making this perfect memory of love with them. It’s an invigorating and powerful feeling of euphoria.
The sixth section “Elizabeth” is dedicated to his latest breakup and wow this chapter really resonated with me. I could write about how I related to each poem but I won’t do that to y ’all. Instead I’ll write about the two poems that really spoke to me. The poem Late Nights really resonated with me, especially the lines “I wonder how it was so easy, how you did it so quickly/I am in a million pieces, which ones first, how do I pick” (Robare) When I go through the grief on a breakup, I think I’m the only one that feels pain and hurt and assume that for them, it was easy to break things off and walk away unscathed. And I’m left shattered and I’m angry. I remember thinking at one time that I was over dramatic saying one ex left me shattered in a million pieces but now I think it was an accurate description to how I felt at the time. Another poem I liked was Best. The poem is about wanting to always be there for your ex. I give Robare a lot of credit for having the maturity do this. The lines , “ I am always here, if you ever needed anything because forever is what I meant” (Robare) . It’s admirable that he can do this because I honestly can’t. It would be nice if I could but I lack the emotional maturity to do so. This is also a beautiful poem because of how Elizabeth’s humanity is conveyed in a way that respects her. I also want to add that reading this section added an element of healing to my life. It shifted my perspective a bit on some past trauma from past romantic relationships.
What I also found refreshing about this book is that while there were lots of raw emotions to be felt I really didn’t find him blaming any of his exes. In fact, I hold Robare in high esteem with how he expressed his accountability for his actions and how he really respected the humanity of his past partners throughout the book even when he was talking about something really painful. There is hardly any saltiness to be found anywhere in this book, for that you can just read my blog. Lol. Seriously, reading Robare’s poetry inspired me to change my direction a bit in how I write about love. I’m not going to drastically change how I write but I could do better in shifting my perspective a bit and instead of constantly writing about how love is shit, I could write more about how love can be a good thing. I also think Robare is very talented for putting into words what many of us are too scared to express. He’s brave for that. I also want to thank Tim Robare for writing this book and publishing it because it almost felt like serendipity for me to buy it and read it at the time that I did. And of course, I highly recommend this book if you like poetry that speaks to your heart. Below is the link for Loving Her:
McKenzie Harpe’s debut collection, When Pens Became Megaphones is aptly named because of how powerful the writing is in this book. The poems in this book are passionate and compelling in examining a variety of themes. A few of the themes covered in this book are mental health, relationships, family, racism, and social injustice. . The book is divided into four sections which are, “Speak With Yo’ Mind”, “Speak with Yo’ Soul”, “Speak with Yo Fist” and “Speak with Yo’ Heart”. Harpe does not mince words or is subtle to express herself in her poetry and that is something I greatly admire. I also want to mention that the format and presentation of the book is very professional and flawless in how it’s laid out making it very appealing for the reader. I will discuss 2 poems from each section that really spoke to me.
The first section “Speak With Yo’ Mind” talks frankly and honestly about anxiety and the feelings that come along with it and how the poet copes. The poet presents a true understanding of how some people feel with the burden of anxious thoughts and how trying to find peace with that can feel like an uphill battle. A poem that spoke to me about dealing with anxiety was Medicine. The poem Medicine talks about the healthy coping mechanism that music can be for someone with mental health issues. This is presented in the fourth stanza with the lines “music is my only redemption/the only prevention/for lost hope” (Harpe,15) As a person with mental health issues myself, music is one of my healthiest coping mechanisms. When the world gets too “noisy” for me, I tend to put my earbuds in and play something to either calm me down or hype me up depending on my mood. Another poem from this section that resonated with me was Evicted. Evicted presents a picture about kicking anxiety out. This is presented when the poet states, “see, I only came to organize/my thoughts on my hanger, /but now I’m cleaning out more than my closet. /I’m kicking you out, anxiety” (Harpe,17) There is a power in that verse which shows the poet taking her power back from anxiety taking up space in her mind. As a person who also suffers from anxiety, I completely get it.
The second section pays a tribute to where the poets come from and her family. Harpe does this by talking about the women in her family as well as her friends. One poem that I especially loved was My Day Ones where she captures the ease that comes from long term friendships or connections. This is stated in the poem, “a necessary vent/ after years/of personal growth/and that vibes still the same” (Harpe,31) This poem resonated with me because it reminded me of the connection I have with my childhood friends from Hawaii. Weeks or months can pass by without us talking and out of the blue one of us will say something in our group chat and we’ll catch up on life. Another poem I absolutely loved from this section was Auntie. It displays the resilience and strength of a woman who has breast cancer. Harpe shows this woman’s strength from the first line, “I know a woman/who’s not afraid of monsters” (Harpe,36). This poem resonates with me when I think about breast cancer survivors and victims of breast cancer . Another thing I like about this poem is that Harpe captures the essence of this woman going through something really harrowing in a way that respects her humanity.
The third section Harpe explores the great social injustices that have been happening and still happen in this country. Harpe does this by talking frankly and honestly about racism and white privilege. The poem Armed is one of my favorite poems in the whole book. It speaks about how words can be weapons of change. When Harpe says, “I load my pen with thoughts/the aim with precision/ spit fire on these pages/ and hope you see my vision/ this is more than just a poem (Harpe,59), she speaks the truth with how people tend to underestimate the power that artists can have when to comes to social change. This poem reminded me that one of the reasons I write is to give a voice to the marginalized immigrant community that I come from. Another poem that really resonated with me in this section was the poem The Five Senses. This poem addresses how white privilege continues to undermine and oppress minorities in this country. I was blown away by how the poet used all of five senses to do this. For example, for the sense of hearing in stanza 2, the poet states “what does it sound like? /hearing a native language/and calling it a threat. /yelling at minorities/to go back home/to places they never even met/like we didn’t forget/you never discovered/this country to begin with, (Harpe,66). That stanza gives me goosebumps from how powerful it is in addressing racists and calling out their hypocrisy. This part in this poem really resonated too since I have been subject to prejudice and discrimination due to my ethnicity and former immigration status.
The fourth section “Speak with Yo’ Heart” explores themes related to love and it’s not just centered on romantic love, but it also talks about self-love. I really resonate with the poem Dramatic. In the first stanza the poet states “when you date a poet/understand that your attitude/will become similes/your emotions/will become metaphors/your actions/will be the starting line/for each stanza ( Harpe,83) How true is this for many poets who will take their inspiration from their romantic relationships. Some of us even have a blog dedicated to this type of poetry (😉😏). Another poem that really stood out from this section was Saving Grace. In this poem, Harpe talks about her “toxic relationship with anxiety” and how it has impacted her. A powerful verse in this poem was “this time I felt sad/lonely/and nonexistent. /turns out, he had changed into this person/called depression (Harpe,93). Harpe shows how agonizing it feels like for a lot of us when our anxiety turns into depression. I also want to mention that the end of this poem was very hope and filled with faith. Once again, Harpe captures the painful truth that most of us with anxiety and depression must live with.
With her debut collection, Harpe presents an amazing talent for being open and honest about life, identity, social justice, and mental health. My only complaint about this book is that I wanted to read more. Yes, that’s how good this poetry collection was. I don’t usually read a book in one sitting but Harpe’s writing captivated me in such a way that I couldn’t put it down. I highly recommend this book for anyone who likes poetry that’s inspiring and empowering. I look forward from reading more from this poet. Below is a link to When Pens Become Megaphones