I wrote this poem in November of 2022.
I’ve been called an angel by many men and treated as such
and it never worked out and they always left me
because they couldn’t accept the devil in me
I’m more than just a pretty girl always smiling for you-
at times I’m also a crazy girl who breaks out in tears spontaneously
I’m a depressed girl who sometimes loses perspective of it all
If you’re gonna love the angel, you also have to accept and love
the devil in me
I wrote this poem in November of 2025.
a shot of eggnog for every time love went wrong
and I end up in the hospital with alcohol poisoning
something about the holidays always triggers my depression
and now that the kids are older I no longer have to fake cheerfulness
to be a mom to them
and now that I’m alone once again, I regress back to the bitter bitch
I was before him
and instead of reaching out to him and sending him the dozens of poems
about his departure
Instead, I drink several shots of alcoholic eggnog while listening to olivia rodrigo
as I go into hysterics rereading every single chapter in my book of lust and love
trying to accept I’ll always be a failure in love
I wrote this poem in November of 2025.
Become medusa the minute I’m jealous,
left for another or ignored
and out comes my pouts about how
I’ve been so wrong
I become a monstrosity of absurdity
as I distort reality
but really, none of it was really that deep
all these men were silly passing up
a masterpiece like me
and none of the ever deserved
my angry or creative energy
I wrote this poem in November of 2022.
I’m ready to start living without demons from my past visiting me in my dreams
or showing up in my poetry
I’m ready for a new love story with someone who’s completely different
from anyone I’ve ever known
not someone who causes me physical and emotional harm
only to later one fill me with pseudo apologies and promises to change
I need someone who’ll make me laugh and understand there’s sometime conflict
and won’t judge me for my complicated and traumatic past-
someone who’ll stay through my bullshit
someone who won’t scare away easily
I’m ready for a new love story where for once I’m the heroine,
the protagonist, the main character,
and not the villain, the victim or someone’s dirty little secret
i wrote this poem in November of 2022.
Don’t invest your feelings in me
I’m not worth the risk
Sooner or later I’ll let you down
and you’ll feel like a clown
it’s better to keep this casual
or you’ll end up another casualty
in my book of lust and love
when feelings get involved
I wrote this poem in November of 2025.
Try to touch the ache of alienation with my pen
writing poems to find
a find a sense of belonging
a sense of community
something beyond the platter of nonsense reality serves
I wrote this poem in November of 2022.
when no one is watching I manifest a new lover-
I’m tired of solitude, I’m tired of crying from loneliness
so I dream about him, I write about him
and I pray that he appears
and while I tell myself it’s ok if he doesn’t exist
and it’s just one of my many silly dreams
secretly I want him to become a reality
I just want to know what it’s like for once
to be loved and accepted for the complicated
Woman that I am
I wrote this poem in October of 2022.
until we meet again, Peru
i’ll hold you in my heart and dream about the warmth of my tia
and remember the taste of ceviche and carapulcra
and the smell of the busy city streets with too much traffic
America can never compare to your rich history or the warmth of your people
I wrote this poem in October of 2025.
let the spirits guide you to greater good
to reaching your full potential
there’s a reason they appear in your dreams,
in the trees, in poetry
I wrote this poem in October of 2022.
my roots are locked in a this land
that calls me an other, a forever foreigner
a land where I’ve never felt welcomed
and yet this is what I call home
this is where I went to school
this is where my children were born and raised
this is the only other place I’ve called home
I wrote this poem in October of 2022 with the help of Quora.
what do most people not understand about borderline personality disorder?
what are borderline psychopaths?
can you trust someone with borderline personality disorder?
can someone who has bpd have empathy and feel bad for what they have done?
does a borderline individual ever had a hard time getting over someone or
can they easily forget?
what is borderline personality rage?
what hurts a person with BPD?
why is borderline personality so contradictory?
do people with BPD act normal to everyone except the person they’re splitting on?
are people with BPD childlike ?
can unconditional love treat borderline disorder?
does a person with bpd make their partners go crazy?
how do borderlines show they love you?
do borderlines ever find happiness, hope or a genuine connection?
what does a bpd episode look like?
should someone with BPD ever disclose that to a potential mate?
when do relationships with PwBpd start to fall apart?
are borderline psychotic?
can borderline disorder be cured?
I wrote this poem in October of 2025.
All of the ingredients for a long term love and I fawn
I don’t think I’ve ever here before you
you shower me with consistency, desire, attention and respect
you actually care about how I’ve slept
you know how to reassure me repeatedly
I’m worthy enough to be loved
and all of my past romantic tragic comedies
were a all practice and experience for you
a real sanctuary to lay me love in
I wrote this poem in October of 2022.
in the dark shadows of the earth
lies the outliers and outcasts
the ones we many times ignore
or only talk about in quiet whispers
we pity them, we’re afraid of them, we avoid them
we don’t want to catch their disease of poverty or insanity
we don’t know how to see their humanity
and honestly it makes us, and not them, the real monsters
I wrote this poem in October of 2022.
in Lima, I never had to tone down my theatrics
everyone was just like me
not filtering what was on their mind
they left no thoughts behind
loud and emotional is seen as normal
passionate is the standard
i never had to reign myself in
I could just be without thinking
without doing any explaining
I wrote this poem in October of 2025.
drove towards the moon, full of uncertainty and ambiguity
Wondering what’s next for me, tired of being the foundation
tired of acting like I don’t crash out
Drove towards the moon full of uncertainty and ambiguity
trying to manifest something softer and calmer for myself
where I’m not fighting for survival
