poesía: mi cliente favorito

aquí esta la version en Ingles:

poetry: my favorite customer

era otra noche aburrida en el trabajo
estaba atrapada en la isla diez
entre alma naciendo productos
y mis pensamientos intrusivos
una canción de los 90s suena de la altavoz
y cuando voy a cantar
escucho pasos detrás de mí
me volteo y él está allí
mi cliente favorito, 5’10, cabello negro y crespo
labios carnosos y rojos, y un cuerpo hecho
por un dios griego
estaba mirando las ollas y sartenes
me volteó al revés para que el no me vea
y mientras amanecía los tupperware
le echaba miradas furtivas
esperaba que él no se daría cuenta
de mi porque estaba hecha toda
un desmadre para coquetear
y mi corazoncito muerto resucitó
y empezó a volar mi imaginación
con fantasías de nuestro primer beso
y justo alli
el se me acercó y pensé, “hay dios mio”
claro que me pregunto por una olla
que no teniamos
le dije que “no” y me disculpe
el me contesto “no paso nada”
con su voz quebrada
y rapido se fue
y me pregunte, “estoy alucinando
pero se me hace que el también esta atraido a mi”

poetry: who am i?

I wrote this poem in February of 2024.

me at 13

love ties me up and binds with a rope of shame
slowly I fade away until I’m nothing
I don’t recognize who I am
Friends tell me I’ve changed
I tell them they’re crazy
messages appear in dreams
I’m living a fake life
who am i? who am i? who am i?

poetry: my favorite customer

this poem was inspired by this silly poem from 2006 called, “A poetic tale”.

this is the vibe of this poem..lol

it was another boring night at work
I was stuck on aisle 10 between stocking
and my racing thoughts
a 90s dance song comes on the speaker
and just when I’m about to sing
I heard footsteps behind me
I turned around and there he was-
my favorite customer
5’10 ,curly black hair, full red lips
and a body built by some Greek God
he was looking at pots and pans
I quickly turned my back to stock the tupperware
and sneaked glances and admired him from afar
hoped he didn’t notice me in my Kroger garb
I looked like too much of hot mess to flirt
but still my dead and jaded heart was resuscitated
and my imagination took flight
as fantasies of him surfaced to my mind
and just as I’m imagined our first kiss
he approached me, -OH NO!
of course he asked for a specific type of pan
we didn’t have
I told him no and apologized
in my best customer service voice
and he told me “no worries”
as his voice cracked and walked away quickly
and I wondered, am I imagining things,
or is he also attracted to me?

poetry: purpose

I wrote this poem in January of 2024.

that cabinet also brings purpose to my life- it holds almost all of my stories

Open mics, family, karaoke nights, dance parties,
Tarot readings, poems written on sticky notes,
Epiphany after epiphany about how I have always been worthy,
Long conversation about life in coffee shops,
Trips to my dad’s hometown, sharing silly verses with friends
making dumb videos, coffee cups that say main character energy
dancing in car while I drive, taking picture of the moon
and everything else that brings me joy,
and every single experienced Ive lived,
every single person I’ve loved
is what my life’s purpose is about
It’s joy,hate, love, anger, empathy, envy
it all brings purpose to my wretched everyday
existence

poesía: al otro lado

here’s the English version of this poem:

https://lifeonthebpd.com/?p=11733

nos dejo de la noche a la manana
volo al otro lado
para encontrarse con su amado
dejándonos con un duelo inmenso
no hay lágrimas o palabras
para ablandar nuestro dolor
y ahora nos volvemos
en montañas de remordimientos
hasta que aceptamos
que el paso el tiempo será nuestro
mejor amigo para sanar
de su gran ausencia

poetry: community

I wrote this poem in January of 2024.

my community is my three of cups

while I’ve been obsessed with everything that has gone wrong with my life
I’m learning to finally acknowledge everything that went right
always been blessed to have a community of friends
who loved and accept me as the crazy and creative mess that I have always been
for that I am most grateful to the universe
the ultimate gift of friendship

poetry: the other side

this poem is an updated version from the 2006 poem, “she flew”

ai generated image of funeral

she’s gone to the other side
leaving us in a state of mourning
no tears, no words soften the emotional blow
can’t take back how we took her for granted
and now anger, regret, and remorse
becomes who we are
until we accept the passage of time
is our biggest ally in healing from her absence

poetry: shadows

I wrote this poem in January of 2024.

true story

Shadows of past sorrows came to visit me tonight
they were triggered by that Taylor swift song on vinyl
I poured myself some Hennessy to cope
made a toast to what could have beens
as tears fall on my paper trying to understand
the journey is sometimes shitty and full of nails
I had to step to get here
on the other side of madness and chaotic living
Living life intentionally and no longer just for the moment

poesía: nachos y queso

here’s the English version of this poem:

https://lifeonthebpd.com/?p=11722

nachos y queso son un poema de amor para mi estómago
satisface mi antojo para algo salado
mi lengua se despierta cuando el queso se derrite en mi boca
y me mareo con júbilo
y me vuelvo una víctima a mi glotonería
mi lengua se vuelve más avaricioso mientras
que mi presión arterial vuela y vuela
hasta que mi corazón amenaza con explotar

poetry: bridging the gaps

I wrote this poem in January of 2024.

manifesting that one day my book will be here

In bridging the gaps of my story that have remained unresolved
every story, every poem leads to pieces of healing and closure
I’ve been desperately search for since I can remember
Whatever my child self , my teenage self couldn’t voice back then
My middle age self brings to the surface
and while at times it’s difficult and terrifying
it’s needed in the process of healing and evolving

poetry: nachos and cheese

this is an updated version of the 2006 poem, “nachos and cheese”

ai generated nachos and cheese

nachos and cheese makes my tummy oh so happy
satisfies my craving for something salty
my taste buds are greatly aroused
as the cheese melts in my mouth
and I grow dizzy with glee
becoming a victim to my gluttony
my taste buds grow greedy for more
even my blood pressure soars

poetry: tonight

I wrote this poem in January of 2024.

me at open mic-my happy place

we gather here tonight
to share the most vulnerable parts of ourselves
through poems written on a whim, in cars,
inspired by dreams and tragedies
and everything in between
some of it will be meaningful
some of it will be nonsense
most of the time, it will be someone
trying to make sense of the world
with a few phrases and sentences
clumsily strung together
and calling it poetry

poesía: amor a la primera vista

here’s the English version of this poem:

congelada en su familiaridad
atrapada en la traición lenta de su cuerpo
aburrimiento y soledad le abrazaban
como un amante
se ahoga en su sollozos y olvidada
por casi todos sus seres queridos
su mundo estancado en silencio
hasta que lo vio
con ojos chinitos y azules como ella
y piel arrugada como las sabanas
de amantes
era una visión horrorosa
pero para sus ojos cansados de ella
era una explosion de alegría
su última adoración
su último suspiro de vida
ella acababa con su aroma de pureza
el comenzaba con el olor viejo de experiencia

poesía: luz

Escribí este poema en enero de 2024.

quizás algún día

trato de bajar la luz en mis ojos cuando estoy contigo
y no muestro todo lo que siento por ti
no te quiero asustar, no quiero que te vayas de mi vida
Entonces juego mi rol de ser tu amiga
fingiendo inocencia y intenciones puras
cuando conversamos de todo y nada de la vida

poesía: utopia

here’s the English version of this poem:

https://lifeonthebpd.com/?p=11706

llévame a recorrido de tu utopía
del cual tu siempre hablas
el sitio donde no hay trastornos
Mentales
donde todos nos quedamos dormidos
sin la necesidad de tranquilizantes
el cual a todos se le tratan con respeto
y son celebrados por ser diferentes
y no son marginados
o insultados