Here is the English Version of this poem:
https://lifeonthebpd.com/2021/11/28/poetry-thank-you/
Gracias por hacerme saber
que estaba con una desgraciado infeliz
Gracias por quitar la venda de mis ojos que yo tenía
pensando que él era solo mio
Gracias por decirme que mi amorcito
me llenaba de mentiras
Y por ultimo gracias por quitarmelo de encima
el nunca mereció alguien tan buena como yo
I wrote this about my oldest son after a very proud mom moment. I thought about everything he went through and processed it through this poem.
I didn’t think this day
Would come so soon
I wasn’t prepared for the
Emotions I would feel
“You were doomed to
Be another “statistic”
They said
And autism on top of that!
Good luck
Becoming a productive
Member of society
They said
“No way, will you succeed
brown autistic boy,
Son of a teenage mom”
They said
Yet here you are –
Proving the naysayers wrong
Here is where you belong
Not yet graduated from
High school but starting
Your first college classes
Tonight
Here is where you belong
Despite the obstacles,
The haters, society
Trying to fuck you over
Here is where you belong
-on the start of a journey to success
And here I am
Beaming with pride
And love for you
My beautiful brown boy
Defying everything and
Everyone that ever
Stood in your way.
Here is the English version of this poem:
https://lifeonthebpd.com/2021/11/29/poetry-i-wish-i-could/
Deseo olvidar todo lo que vivimos
el amor que hicimos, las risas que compartimos
Deseo hacerte ver el daño que me hiciste
Deseo hacer sentir mi agonía intensa y aguda
Deseo herirte y lentamente destruirte
Deseo que esto no me importara más
pero la vida no es justa
Here is the English version of this poem:
https://lifeonthebpd.com/2021/12/08/poetry-maybe/
he caído en un abismo de tristeza
descubriendo que tu eras otro infeliz
que me usastes para tu placer carnal
fui ciega al pensar que me querías de verdad
fui una inútil enamorandome de ti
es mejor que ya pare
jugando este juego de amor
For the English version of this poem, click link below:
https://lifeonthebpd.com/2021/11/15/poetry-why-did-you/
Porque me demore tanto tiempo
en descubrir que tu eras
otra cancion estupida
Porque tuvistes que ser una basura
y dejarme con un sabor amargo en mi boca
Porque me creí en tu actuación de hombre bueno
Porque causastes una herida tan severa en mi corazón
Estoy harta de este infierno de tristeza
Porque te apareciste en mi vida
solo para arruinarmela
I wrote this poem sometime around 2014 or 2015. I was feeling nostalgic about a former flame I had been obsessed with. This tends to happen a lot with me. Letting go of my past is hard at times.
Shadows of my past
Envelop my future
Everywhere I go
Time has passed
I am older
Harsh experiences
Have made my cynical
And embrace
My mediocrity
But still
Shadows of the past
Envelop my future
Everywhere i go
I’m happy that you found
Your idyllic happiness
With someone else
And living the life
You always wanted
But shadows of our past
Envelop my future
Everywhere I go
I love my children
I love my spouse
But for one more moment
Of us
I would leave them
And everything else behind
Shadows of our past
Envelops my future
Everywhere I go
Here is the English Version of this poem:
https://lifeonthebpd.com/2021/11/09/poetry-hell-sent/
Debi seguido mi intuición
cuando sentí que me mentías
Cuando me decías que estabas trabajando
En realidad, estabas follando
Debí irme de tu vida
la primera vez que me mentiste
pero quería creer en tu cuento de hadas
ahora siento un alivio profundo desde que terminamos
porque tu fuistes mandado del infierno
I wrote this 2013 about my husband.
Silence, awkward silence is what was left after everything they needed to say was said
It was the same fight over and over again.
Old wounds were brought to the surface and reopened.
She blamed him for derailing her ambitions
and he blamed her for derailing the productive and selfish life he once led.
They both couldn’t see that they were both at fault
for not continuing to push each other to flourish
but instead they fell into a complacent spell
And a pattern of a comfortable
and the fruitless routine of suburban life.
And the years went on and they had nothing to show for it
except debt and wrinkles they both inflicted upon themselves.
And the years went on and all that was left
was regret for her for the things that she didn’t get to experien
For the English Version of this poem, click link below:
https://lifeonthebpd.com/2021/11/19/poetry-i-thought/
Fuistes otro amor falso
otro lleno de perfidio
pretendiendo tener buenas intenciones
me causaste una desconfianza profunda
Espinas de odio crecieron en mi
aprendiendo que era otra falda más
fue una verdad difícil de tragar
Ahora gritaré todo mi miseria y rencor
I wrote this poem in January of this year for a DBT exercise about being creative.
My love for Joe Goldberg is for real
even if he is a psycho serial killer
he might kill me but won’t abandon me
or break up with me
My love for Joe Goldberg is healthy and lovely
It brings a calm and serenity like no other
My love for Joe Goldberg makes me understand
Myself better
I’m like him, in love with love
My love for Joe Goldberg is the only one I want
for now
I’d rather deal with a fictional crazy Joe
rather than a real life asshole
I wrote this in 2009 about Brad.
Rejection
Is an interruption
Of the infatuation
I felt towards you
Rejection
Is a profound sadness
With a river of tears
That flows down my cheeks
Rejection
Is a broken promise
You made
That breaks my heart
Along with the rest of me
Rejection
Is the start of learning
Who you are
Behind the facade
Of infatuation
Here is the English Version of this poem:
https://lifeonthebpd.com/2021/11/30/poetry-pride/
Nunca sabrás del dolor
Que sentí por tu abandono
nunca veras
las lagrimas que llore por ti
nunca descubrirás
como me llenaste con agonía
Porque soy demasiado orgullosa
para admitir que fui una babosa
Por que tengo demasiada dignidad
para estar llena de miseria por tu culpa
Por tengo demasiado respeto
Para convertirme en un desastre
Here is the English version of this poem:
https://lifeonthebpd.com/2022/10/02/eliza-conquers-heartbreak-poetry-edition-2/
Espero, espero, y espero por tu llamada
para oír que mi soledad fue una pesadilla
Espero, espero, y espero que aparezcas en mi puerta
para decirme que todavía me deseas
Espero por tu carta por correo
diciéndome que me echas de menos
I wrote in December of 2012 when I was amidst a great depression.
Recognizing the triggers of
My depression is one of
The hardest things I have to do
It’s when I’m silent
Wishing all the bad things
Would go away
It’s when I stop listening
To music
It’s when I struggle
To open my eyes
And face another dreadful day
Life on the BPD 