This is another poem about the bio dad of my oldest son. Obviously I had a lot of anger directed at him that I should have gone to therapy for but instead I just wrote a lot of angry poetry. Ha.
I wrote this poem in 2006 about my tumultuous relationship with writing. I love to write and it’s saved me more times than I can count. However, I tend to beat myself up if I’m not writing enough.
Instead of tears from eyes that long to spill, I will spill words onto these pages. Words that make sense, Words that don’t make sense, Many are in fact nonsense I will let my emotions, the wind And my surroundings guide me until I fill up these pages Full of nonsense, prose, Poetry, ideas, and everything I can think of This will be a new phase this new phase will be full of promise and potential And it will also be full of what I hope is the inspiration that leads me to share my relationship to the world. this will be my fourth baby Another one I will nurse and raise until it is As beautiful and complete as my real life ones. This is the promise I make to my pathetic little beast.
I wrote this in 2006 after I was reflecting my first years of being a mother to my eldest child who I had at 17. Becoming a mother at such a young age didn’t make me the best parent and at times I still tried to act my age and party a lot even though I was a parent. It used to eat me up inside but I’ve come to terms that I did the best I could under the circumstances.
En nuestra primera cita fuimos a las películas, a comer, y caminamos bajo la luna hablamos acerca de varias cosas Mencionaste a alguien en Miami pero sentimos una química intensa fue algo irresistible De alli nos besamos A lo mejor eras algo prohibido para mi pero prendiste un fuego dentro de mi perdí mis valores y morales y me somete al deseo inmenso que sentia por ti