
I love you
but I hate you
I miss you
but you’re a jerk
I desire you
but your love is awful
I want you here with me
but you make me suffer
I want to kiss you
but you steal my calm
I keep you in my heart
but with you I lose my mind
This is another poem about the bio dad of my oldest son. Obviously I had a lot of anger directed at him that I should have gone to therapy for but instead I just wrote a lot of angry poetry. Ha.

You don’t know him and chances are
You never will
You could’ve been somebody real in his life
But you BLEW IT!
So now is the time to say
Goodbye forever.
Day 20 of doing a 31-day poetry prompt challenge. Today’s prompt is “Falling in Fall” .


I wrote this poem in 2006 about my tumultuous relationship with writing. I love to write and it’s saved me more times than I can count. However, I tend to beat myself up if I’m not writing enough.
Instead of tears from eyes that long to spill,
I will spill words onto these pages.
Words that make sense,
Words that don’t make sense,
Many are in fact nonsense
I will let my emotions, the wind
And my surroundings guide me until
I fill up these pages
Full of nonsense, prose,
Poetry, ideas, and everything I can think of
This will be a new phase
this new phase will be full
of promise and potential
And it will also be full
of what I hope is the inspiration
that leads me to share my relationship
to the world.
this will be my fourth baby
Another one I will nurse and raise until it is
As beautiful and complete as my
real life ones.
This is the promise I make to
my pathetic little beast.
I wrote this in 2006 after I was reflecting my first years of being a mother to my eldest child who I had at 17. Becoming a mother at such a young age didn’t make me the best parent and at times I still tried to act my age and party a lot even though I was a parent. It used to eat me up inside but I’ve come to terms that I did the best I could under the circumstances.

Late nights at the club
Drunk and dancing-you
Singing lullabies
Until he fell asleep-I
Getting ass from
an unknown stranger-you
Looking for monsters under the bed
and wishing them away-I
Waking up in an unknown place
With a helluva hangover-you
Waking up from little hands
Shaking my shoulders-I
You and I=me
Me =two different truths
About the way your childhood
Was seen
Day 15 of doing a 31-day poetry prompt challenge. Today’s prompt is “Learning to Love Myself”.

Day 13 of doing a 31-day poetry prompt challenge. Today’s prompt was, “On a Moonlit Stage”.

Day 11 of doing a 31-day poetry prompt challenge. Today’s prompt is “Liberation in Chains”.

Day 9 of doing a 31-day poetry prompt challenge. Today’s prompt was “Drenched in Memories” .

Day 9 of doing a 31-day poetry prompt challenge . The prompt was “Drenched in Memories” .

Day 6 of doing a 31-day poetry prompt challenge. Today’s prompt was “A Deafening Silence”

I wrote this poem in 2006 when I was in the midst of my quarter life crisis.

There was once a place
It was my happy place
But it forever disappeared
When puberty appeared
Now I live somewhere else
Where almost everything fails
Where there are no more giggles
And everyone is fickle
Where being sad
Is the fad
And no one cares
About anyone else
What I would give
To get away from this
And go back to
Where no one is rude
And everyone smiles
And no one is a liar
For the English version of this poem, click on the link below:
https://lifeonthebpd.com/2021/11/04/poetry-first-date/

En nuestra primera cita
fuimos a las películas,
a comer, y caminamos bajo la luna
hablamos acerca de varias cosas
Mencionaste a alguien en Miami
pero sentimos una química intensa
fue algo irresistible
De alli nos besamos
A lo mejor eras algo prohibido para mi
pero prendiste un fuego dentro de mi
perdí mis valores y morales
y me somete al deseo inmenso
que sentia por ti
2000

I wrote this poem in late 2005 when I was going to school full time, working part time and raising two kids.
Trapped in a maze
Not knowing where to go
Gotta get out of this place
Before becoming conformity’s whore
A maze with traps
Like kids and responsibilities
It’s all getting too suffocating
And I can’t breathe