Posted on by pattytacuri

Flash Fiction: Once Again

I wrote this in 2004 and revised it recently. It’s not based on anything from real life.

hard truth

They’re driving back from the theater. All evening he’s been quiet and she wonders what is going on. She reaches for his hand but he won’t give it to her. She tries to look into his eyes and he looks away.She can feel him cold and distant. She no longer recognizes what is supposed to be “them”. With tears in her eyes, she says, “Tell me what’s wrong.”

“Nothing.” he says as he’s still evading her eyes.

“Do you still love me?” she asks with a quivering voice. 

“I’m sorry.I’m in love with someone else. It’s nothing you did. These things happen, I hope–

“STOP!” she yells. She’s barely holding it together at this point. 

“I’m really sorry, I just want to-”

“STOP! I’m done with this. Stop the car.” she screams at him. 

“You’re being crazy, at least let me-”

“NO. I want nothing from you! Stop the car NOW!”

“You need to calm — he stops mid sentence as he sees her taking off her seat belt and unlocking the door. He stops the car. He says, “I just want–” 

“Fuck what you want” she says as she gets out of the car.

“But I-”

“There is nothing left to say”. She tells him. She walks away while she cries and laughs.She whispers to herself  “fuck.once again”.  

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

Poetry: Veins

I wrote this poem in the fall of 2007. I wrote this one about my husband. It was a good moment but even during the good moments, I’m still insecure.

me in 2007 when this poem was written I look so happy …lol

Veins of love’s 

moss grow

every minute

I’m with you

Will the veins 

ever run out

of moss?

Will you ever 

leave me?

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

Poetry: Lame

This is another poem about the bio dad of my oldest son. Obviously I had a lot of anger directed at him that I should have gone to therapy for but instead I just wrote a lot of angry poetry. Ha.

me and my oldest son in 2006

You don’t know him and chances are 

 You never will

You could’ve been somebody real in his life

But you BLEW IT! 

So now is the time to say 

Goodbye forever. 

Posted on by pattytacuri · 2 Comments

Poetry: Acknowledgement

I wrote this in 2006 thinking back on my time with Lucas.

Tired and contemplating life
me around the time I wrote this poem

A shadow of our friendship
is all there is left
After life gets in the way
of wanting something more
And when I see you around
A wave, a nod
An acknowledgement we once knew
Each other
Our conversations are now long gone
But we’re forever etched in each
other’s minds and dreams

Posted on by pattytacuri

Poetry: License

I wrote this poem in 2002 about my oldest son’s bio dad. I had a lot of angry emotions about how he abandoned him.

Me with my oldest son circa 1999
me with my oldest son circa 1999

A license to create is what shouldn’t

Be given to those who don’t know how to 

Appreciate their child’s laughter 

Or comfort their high pitch cries

A license to create is what shouldn’t 

Be given to those who don’t understand 

What it takes to be an example to 

Those that descend from them 

A license to create is what shouldn’t 

Be given to those who leave children 

In the dust to follow their own desires 

Without looking back on their offspring’s 

 sad little face that whimpers,

“Daddy, come back”

Posted on by pattytacuri · 2 Comments

Poetry: Frustrating

I wrote this in 2006 when me and my husband were in this monotonous routine of kids, work, and school. I felt lonely in our relationship and it was hard for me to express it to him.

Loyalty and loneliness are a bitch.

It’s frustrating
Living like this
Without desire or passion
The only thing that’s left for us
Is to leave from here
This everlasting ocean of loneliness
In which we are drowning
And separately swim to the shore
of happiness
Where we both belong