Poetry: Letter to My Former Lover

I wrote this in January of 2003 about Lucas. I was doing what I normally do, obsessing over past love because I was lonely. At least I wrote this poem instead of trying to track him down.

damn…a hard truth

My dear Luke
I Still miss you
Even after your unexpected departure
My heart feels a terrible torture
Of not having you by my side
I wonder if for me, you ever cried
Why couldn’t you stay?
Instead of leaving on that dreary day
Why did you have to go?
Nobody else could’ve loved you more
I know my letter may seem strange to you
But my heart finds it hard to replace you
I have tried so hard to move on
But it’s impossible to go on
I guess I should say goodbye
Before I start to cry
But before I do this
I gotta tell you my wish
that you find what you need
Even if it’s without me
And if you ever find yourself in love
Understand that you’re enough
and that you fight for it
Don’t run away from it
So now I say goodbye my friend
Maybe one day I’ll see you again

PoesΓ­a: Parar de Amarte

EscribΓ­ este poema en el 2003 acerca de Lucas. La nostalgia de el me visitaba frecuentemente y eso me inspiraba bastante.

Cuantos aΓ±os pasaran
Para pararte de amar
Cuantos labios besare
Para sacarte de mi mente
Cuantos pensamientos mΓ‘s tendrΓ© de ti
Hasta poder olvidarme de ti
Cuando se me quitara este deseo
De querer vivir contigo en un sueΓ±o
Cuando parare
De quererte ver

Poesia: La Misma Historia

Escribi este poema en 2003 acerca de John.

Yo no querΓ­a hacer
La misma historia
De la mujer usada
Pero al ver la indiferencia con la
que me tratas
Yo veo que para ti
No tengo nada de importancia
Que para ti
Nada soy y nunca serΓ©
Pero un dia
Te vas a lamentar
Cuando despuΓ©s de un tiempo
De nuevo me miraras
Y te moriras
Al no poder tocarme
Y los remordimientos vendrΓ‘n
Por haberme menos preciado
Y por haber sido conmigo
Un desgraciado

PoesΓ­a: Bellos Sentimientos

EscribΓ­ este poema en enero de 2003 acerca de un amor que deseaba. TodavΓ­a vivΓ­a con la illusion de encontrar un amor asΓ­.

Me tienes llena de estos bellos sentimientos
con tus tiernas caricias y la maravilla que son tus besos
me devolviste la fe
Por ser aquel hombre
que sabe como tratar a una mujer
Contigo deseo amanecer
Me tienes siempre pensando en ti
Y la esperanza de tenerte junto a mi
Me haces volar
Y otra vez soΓ±ar
Me haces sentir
Y mi sangre hervir
Me vuelves loca
Con tu bella forma de amar
Y a ti siempre me quiero atar

Poetry: Sadness

I wrote this in May of 2003 when I was depressed. At the time, I didn’t think about getting help. I also didn’t understand what was happening to me. No one knew because I had become a master as masking my emotions. Instead poetry was my therapy.

depression is rough

The sadness creeps up on me
like a wild animal
upon its prey
Slowly but surely
I become all too quickly
Miserable again
I ponder the question
Why, why, WHY?
I am young and healthy
Yet I begin to feel
like I’m slipping on thin ice
and what scares me the most
is
I DON”T KNOW WHY?