Poetry: Bilingual

I wrote this in January of 2022.

me at work living that bilingual life

Stuck in between Spanish and English
is a bilingual nightmare
constantly switching between languages
gives me a lifelong jaqueca
and at times I don’t get it right
it’s switching between two identities
Latina or American
it gets hard and confusing at times
but it’s who I am
Hablo con mamá en Español
I speak to my sons in English
Hablo con los pacientes en Español
I speak to my coworkers in English
and to code switch parece una comedia
I’m told that I’m fun and loud en Español
pero soy profesional y reservada in English
eventually I learn to meld
my American and Latina personalities
and I find my most authentic
bilingual and bicultural identity

Poesía: Advertencia

Here is the English version of this poem:

https://lifeonthebpd.com/2021/12/26/poetry-why-dont-you/

porque no te armas de valor y le dices la verdad
en vez de correr de tus sentimientos con infidelidad y borracheras
estas haciendo dano a ti y a ella
pronto tu conciencia te devorara
no te estoy juzgando, estoy preocupado por ti
la gente está empezando con sus chismes
hasta piensan que soy la causa de ti infidelidad
y mientras me río de sus chismes
nuestra colega me contó la verdad
que ella es cómplice en tu infidelidad
y la mirada en su cara me dijo todo
ella está desesperadamente enamorada
esto es un juego de amor peligroso que estás jugando
donde tres personas se van a quemar

Poesia: Maletera Del Carro

Escribi este poema en enero del 2022.

Iba en la maletera del carro
llena de las mentiras de mis padres
que toda estaría bien
y nos íbamos hacia la alegría
a un lugar misterioso y mágico

Iba en la maletera del carro
asustada y llorando lágrimas
mientras mi mami me abrazaba
me decía”cállate, pronto llegaremos a
nuestro destino”

Iba en la maletera del carro
y casi me sentía sofocada
pero mi mami me susurraba
“duérmete, casi llegamos”

Iba en la maletera del carro
y cuando salimos
el sol no sonrió
y fue el primer dia
en nuestra nueva patria

Poetry: The Revenge of the Karens

I wrote this in January of 2022.

Karens always think they’re the best

one day the karens will rise up and protest on the streets
with their short blond hair auspiciously blowing in the wind
and their know it all smirks, armed with latest iphones
in their gucci bags with signs that say, live, laugh and love
or I want to speak to the manager
they’ll stomp in their $100 uggs with a purpose
to be seen and heard
with a purpose to complain about everything
wrong in their world
with a purpose to take their name back
one will get on the megaphone and talk about the oppression
they face because of their name or the pale color of their skin
or their higher social status
and people-well they’ll laugh at them,
they’ll love the absurdity of their message
and live for this-the least empowering moment in history

Poetry: Restless and Unsettled

Aqui esta la version en Espanol:

https://lifeonthebpd.com/2021/12/17/poesia-inquieta/

I am restless and unsettled
realizing you never loved me
I was just another girl to you
nothing special, nothing meaningful
just someone temporary to pass the time with
I’m growing tired of this repetitive story
Another love that expires when I ask
for something more
Another story that starts off with so much promise
only to end up as another tragedy

Poetry: I’m Done Apologizing

I wrote this in January of 2022.

me in January of 2022

I’m done apologizing for being too much or not enough
I’ve always been enough
I’m done apologizing for being crazy
I’m God’s creation of a perfect imperfection
I’m done apologizing for being too bland or too spicy
I’m a perfect blend of whatever I want to be
I’m done apologizing for being me!

Poetry: Writing is My Lifeline

I wrote this in January of 2022.

me in January of 2022 in my writing attire

Writing is my lifeline
with it, I’m almost fine
without it I’m almost lost
and my mind pays the cost

Writing is my lifeline
Especially since I’m borderline
It’s brings my truth to the forefront
It’s almost my antidepressant

Writing is my lifeline
It’s part of my life’s design
I accept it as my passion
and also my ammunition

Poesía: Amor Propio

Here is the English Version of this poem:

https://lifeonthebpd.com/2021/12/20/inner-wealth/

siempre valía mucho más de lo que pensaba
pero no sabía valorarme, no sabía amarme
estaba desesperada por el amor de mis amantes
y les deje que me trataran como una muñeca de trapo
Pensaba que no era suficiente
conformandome con lo peor
No entendía que lo que necesitaba
era un amor propio para sentirme completa y amada

Poetry: Fighting

I wrote this in January of 2022. I was angry.

I ask myself this question every day

Fighting for my cause
I question everything I learned
I take time to pause
my childhood lies burn
and make feel lost

Fighting for my family
I get so fucking angry
Why are people so shitty?
insulting my ancestry-
projecting their insecurities onto me-
Wait, are they jealous of me?

Fighting for my life
I pause of a while
thinking about all of my strife
and the past I need to reconcile
to move forward with my life
but this fight is worthwhile

Prevent Anxiety and Enjoy Life to the Fullest

Image via Pexels

Prevent Anxiety and Enjoy Life to the Fullest

by Julia Mitchell

Anxiety can affect your long-term health. It can limit your ability to exert control, paralyze you, and make you feel helpless. In fact, according to a study by the Global Burden of Disease, depression is the sixth-leading cause of disability. Fortunately, there are things you can do to prevent anxiety attacks. Here are just a few, presented below by Life on the BPD.

Spend Time Outdoors

Spending more time outdoors can reduce anxiety and stress. Your brain receives more oxygen when you breathe in the fresh air, resulting in increased levels of serotonin — the neurotransmitter that alters your mood. Simply walking to the store for milk can lower your levels of cortisol, a stress-causing chemical in your body.  

You’re more likely to feel tired at night if you spend more time outdoors during the day. The better sleep you get at night, the less anxiety you’ll experience the following day. 

Find a More Rewarding Job

Many people find themselves in jobs that they do not enjoy which causes anxiety. If you are one of these people, it may be time to start looking for a more rewarding job. When searching for a new job, think about what you are looking for in a job and consider your interests and skills. 

Once you have a good idea of what you want, begin your search by looking at job postings online. Take the time to update your resume with your latest skills and experience. This free resume may help you get started. You can use this – or similar – templates, which you can modify by adding your own fonts, colors, and images. It will give you a great start to refreshing your current resume.

You may find that, instead of a new job, you’re more interested in a new career with new possibilities. In that case, consider going back to school. There are plenty of reputable, accredited schools with online degree and certification programs, so you can complete coursework on your own time. This page deserves a look if you are interested in technology-related certifications, like CompTIA A+, Cloud+, or Operations Specialist.

Keep an Anxiety Journal

Recording your daily stress and anxiety levels through an anxiety journal is a simple and guided process. Writing them down helps you identify triggers and negative situations that cause your anxiety. So where do you start?

  • Write down your concerns. Write down any immediate concerns you have. Describe them in detail while remembering that with anxiety, it’s not always about what’s happening in the here and now but what’s on the horizon.
  • Review what you’ve written. Ask yourself questions along the lines of: what are the odds of this happening? How do you know? Are you certain? How could you change a negative into a positive if your worries materialize?
  • Rewrite the script. Write down one or more ways to approach a thought or fear differently. Next to your fears, write down different possibilities, and create new endings.

These are just a few ideas to get you started on your anxiety journal. VeryWell Mind explains that writing in your journal daily helps you better understand your anxiety and hopefully prevents future anxiety attacks. 

Create a Happy and Clutter-Free Environment

Your anxiety levels may increase if your family constantly argues, complains, and is overly critical. You can relieve tension in your home by creating a welcoming and vibrant space. Open your windows to let in the fresh air, declutter, and do a deep clean to bring positivity.  

It helps if you optimize your workspace to avoid work-related stress. Rather than sitting in a traditional office chair for long periods, try an ergonomic one. They help keep your body safe and upright to reduce stress on the spine and neck. Insufficient office lighting can reduce energy, dampen mood, and cause eyestrain. Position your desk so that your back is facing the window. You’ll benefit from the light and avoid distractions. In the absence of natural light in your workspace, you can create the illusion of natural window lighting using light colors, such as white and cream, on the walls. 

Start Living Again

Having anxiety can prevent you from leading a normal life. You can get so worked up about an upcoming event that when it arrives, you’re a nervous wreck. Or the simple idea of doing things becomes overwhelming. Anxiety can be debilitating, but there are strategies you can use to calm yourself and lower your anxiety levels. Start by spending some time outside every day (if possible) and use an anxiety journal to help process your feelings. And if your job – or career – isn’t working for you, build a new resume and find a new opportunity. This is your life. Don’t let your anxious mind control it for you.

Life can be challenging, but it’s better to experience it together. Life on the BPD is my attempt to share my challenges to make others feel less alone – and to process my own experiences. Visit my website today to join our community.

Poesia: Anhelo Egoísta

Here is the English version of this poem:

https://lifeonthebpd.com/2021/12/16/poetry-confession/

Que hago perdiéndome en la fantasía de ti
acaso es nuestra química que me ciega?
o puede ser que tu en realidad eres mi alma gemela?
qué importa que estes con otro
abre tus ojos y veras
que tu y yo debemos ser
descarta de la otra
para que podamos empezar a vivir nuestro
cuento de amor

Poetry: Crossroads

I wrote this in January of 2022.

yeah…stop that shit

I’m at another one of life’s crossroads
trying not to make a turn for the worst
don’t stop but don’t go too fast
I want my momentum to last
I slow down and observe
and carefully ride life’s curves
and this time I really listen
and reach out to close friends
I’m not okay but I will be okay
soon I’ll find my way
I’m still grasping for a stable sense of self
and learning how to love and accept myself

Play- Transition: Scene Three

Here is the link to scene 2: https://wp.me/p23LY2-1qu

Scene 3

Setting: Ron’s apartment. It is the same chaotic mess that we have seen before in scene 1. Chloe and Landon are standing outside Ron’s door. LANDON has a suit on while CHLOE has some kind of bohemian ensemble. Landon knocks strongly

Ron opens the door and answers it. Ron’s face looks angry for a minute but quickly changes when he sees LANDON.

RON: Hi son. Well it’s nice to see ya (he almost shuts the door on Chloe)

CHLOE: Um..hmm

RON: (turns to CHLOE): Oh, it’s you

CHLOE: You know, a nice hello would have been sufficient.

RON: (turns to LANDON) Have a seat son.Would you like something to drink?

Landon is kind of looking around at all of the chaotic mess of piles everywhere. He tries really hard to hide the disdainful and disgusted look on his face but can’t. 

LANDON: I’m fine. 

RON: Okay, to what do I owe the pleasure of you coming around. I haven’t seen you for months. 

LANDON: (Clearing his throat) It seems that uh…you are in a dire situation and 

RON: Oh, I see, your little sister got to you. Didn’t she? Well, I’ll tell you right now, she’s worrying you for nothing. Your old man’s alright.

LANDON: You see dad, you are about to be put out of your apartment at the end of the month.

RON: You’re crazy. That ole biddy has been threatening that—

LANDON: Dad! Listen to me, it’s all right here in the contract you signed last time you renewed your lease agreement. 

 (LANDON takes a contract out of the suitcase. RON snatches it, looks it over, his face goes pale with a deer in the headlights look

RON: Well,I’ll…37 years and I have never been late on paying rent. 37 years, your ma and I made this our home. I just can’t—

LANDON: Dad, um

CHLOE pats RON on the back. 

CHLOE: It’s okay dad. Everything will be alright.

RON: I just don’t know what I’m gonna do.

CHLOE: That’s why we’re here. To help you with everything. 

CHLOE hugs RON while LANDON looks on awkwardly. 

Curtain comes down.