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patricia

Bloganuary writing prompt
Write about your first name: its meaning, significance, etymology, etc.
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so I was named for my mom’s sister Patty. My aunt Patty was also the rebel and the baby in the family. My mom named me after her because I had another aunt who wanted me to have her name and my mom hated being pressured about it. So she was pregnant and feeling petty and named me after my aunt Patty. Growing up I was intimidated by her because she was the beauty bombshell and I was this awkward and shy kid growing up. Maybe she’s who I channeled when I pose in my pictures, lol. Anyways, like me she’s also divorced and has three boys of her own. We also both go by Patty rather than our formal name cause Idk Patricia feels like it belongs to some old stuffy Irish nun. Anyways, unlike me, my Aunt Patty is a fabulous cook while I can hardly make rice. Her ceviche will make you cry not only because it’s spicy but because it’s super delicious. As far as the etymology of the name which is such a boring thing to investigate, here’s a link to it:https://www.etymonline.com/word/Patricia

my aunt Patty in the late 80s vs middle age me in 2023
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poetry: betrayed

I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

that time I cut my bangs cause I was anxious about seeing my crush…lol…thank God for my beanie

My heart betrayed me last night
it was on the same page that I need to put any hope of love on hold
Until I’m free of my marital ties-
Until I’m no longer suffering of any residual trauma
from my last failed romantic relationship
but in one night, my heart betrayed my mind
And it felt euphoria and everything that comes with meeting
the potential of love
And while my mind tries to reign in my feelings
My heart says “sorry, we’re already in too deep”

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dream job

the coffee and dessert in Lima is to die for
Bloganuary writing prompt
What’s your dream job?
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my dream job would involve writing and traveling . I can imagine myself somewhere in some foreign country drinking coffee in some cafe where I write poetry as I’m people watching as I blast music in my ear buds.

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poesía: mi primer amor

here’s the English version of this poem:

Poetry: Andrew

cuando me preguntan acerca de mi primer amor
siempre pensaré en el
aquel muchacho alto con los ojos marrones profundos
fue el primero que me trato con respecto y como una princesa
Nuestro cuento de amor fue casi como una película de disney
fue algo mágico y bello
pero algo tan bonito no puede sobrevivir en este mundo cruel
lleno de realidades que se tienen que enfrentar
aunque nos amábamos con una pasión hecho de fuego
no fue suficiente y nuestra llama de amor se apago
y nos fuimos por caminos diferentes
el hizo su vida y yo la mía
pero aunque han pasado más de 25 años
cuando me pregunten que fue mi primer amor
siempre pensaré en el

Posted on by pattytacuri

poetry: staple

I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

my drunk face at bad bunny dance party in January 2023

a drunk driver hits an ambulance-
and there is outcry, an uproar over the craziness of it all
we all judge and hate the drunk driver without compassion
without looking in the mirror, without acknowledging
how most of us have made alcohol a staple,
a must need for celebration-
a must have for everyone no matter what social class you’re in

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poesía: mi pequeña bestia

here’s the english version of this poem:

Poetry: My Pathetic Little Beast

cuando las lágrimas quieren salir
busco mi cuaderno y empiezo a escribir
dejo que mi pequeña bestia de creatividad
llena la pagina con todo lo que sofoco y suprimo
llena la pagina con el desmadre y las pendejadas
que ocupan espacio en mi mente
y escribo, escribo, escribo
hasta que encuentro claridad
hasta qué puedo respirar

Posted on by pattytacuri

three poems about love

I wrote these three poems in November of 2022 when I was still married. One thing I wanted to mention about the first poem is that even though my ex no longer serves me breakfast, he’s still super reliable. For example, my car decided to kiss another car this morning (car accident) and he was the first one I called to help as I was overwhelmed. Granted, we still live in the same house but he didn’t have to come and still came. I’m glad we are still able to be friends despite the fact that we’re divorced. I think that when it comes to love, familial and friendship love is the best kind of love there is out there for me.

my car was trying to kiss another car…
Bloganuary writing prompt
Can you share a positive example of where you’ve felt loved?
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little reminders

little reminders of how I’m loved

greet me on daily basis

breakfast served by my starter husband

my son asking me if I’m okay

my coworker saying one of my poems moved her

the cold breeze in the air kissing my face

my favorite song playing on the radio at the right time

it’s the little reminders that give me hope in humanity 

11/20/22

friends

friends provide everything a lover hasn’t been able to-

an unconditional love and acceptance 

where they provide a space for me to be who I really am

they don’t care if I’m dramatic or loud 

they encourage me when I’m down 

and they never leave me when I’m too much

11/19/22

my community 

community is my tia’s buenos dias on whatsapp

or mami’s phone calls to check up on me

community is greeting my fellow runners on my route

or laughing with my coworkers about the latest absurd policy

community is blasting yung gravy from my car radio

or vomiting my feelings out on paper or at open mic

community is everyone and everything I love

11/9/22

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poetry: Peruvian ME

I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

I still wonder who Peruvian Me would have been-probably not wearing this beanie…lol

if my parents hadn’t chosen america as their new homeland
I wonder who I would’ve been
a woman of priviledge married to a man who loves me for me
or would it have been inevitable for me to turn out as a rebel who’d cause many scandals
would I have take my education more seriously because of the pressure from society and my parents
or would I have still struggled with my ADD and said fuck it
I wonder who Peruvian me would have been if I didn’t have a bilingual and bicultural identity

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google storage says I’m running out of room

me when I start decluttering …lol
Bloganuary writing prompt
Where can you reduce clutter in your life?
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In an ideal world, I would reduce a lot of clutter in my life if my emotionally supportive ex husband moved out. I can’t kick him out though cause my children would cause a ruckus and hate me. Plus, I’m trying to be patient and give him time or find some way we can live apart (I’ve been set on this goal for years), I guess I could find other ways to reduce clutter. I could go through my closet and dresser and get rid of clothes I don’t wear anymore and donate them to goodwill. I could also go through my bookcase and donate books. Honestly, I need to go through my room and the entire downstairs of my house and do a deep decluttering and cleaning. I could also through my google storage and delete the videos, pictures, and files I don’t need since I’m always running out of google storage so this is something I really need to do. My problem is that with little free time I have off, I like to get lost in writing poems, reading, or watch TV and have no desire to do adult things unless I absolutely have to. I guess I could add it to my 2024 goals.

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poetry: same,kid,same

I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

the moment that inspired this poem

They laid him on my breast and told me,
“Meet your baby boy” and I was in shock
the alien on top of me is mine?
this wasn’t supposed to be part of my adolescence
I’m only seventeen and some days I barely remember
to brush my teeth
and now I have this great responsibility
and his beady and angry eyes questions
as to why his comfort was disturb-he already hates the world
and I think , same, kid, same

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another writing prompt

shoutout to twitter for being there when I’m drunk and want to overshare
Bloganuary writing prompt
In what ways do you communicate online?
View all responses

WordPress, twitter
Instagram, facebook (ew)
tik tok (cringe)
and email(when necessary)
and occasionally tumblr
it’s how I share my art, my beauty,
my vulnerability with the world

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

poetry: contacts and glasses

I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

still cute in my glasses

I go between contacts and glasses to fit my different personas-
in my contacts I’m a pretty woman with makeup and a dress
I become the kind of woman men are nervous to be around
or get intimidated by
In glasses I don’t care to capture the male gaze or even mine
it’s when I work that second job or I’m at home
it’s when I allow myself to just exist
not caring about the pressure to be attractive
or allow my social conditioning to take over
and tell me since I’m this crazy, I need to be pretty, sexy, charming
to validate my existence
Lately I prefer my glasses, lately I want the freedom to just be

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poetry: music and lyrics

I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

kid krow by Conan Gray-This album was on repeat in 2023 and it either hyped me up or destroyed me -it was wonderful

music and lyrics have always given me a sense of home-
it’s how I’ve grown and evolved
It’s how I learned to express my emotions
when I couldn’t make sense of anything
it fills my soul with love and creativity
it makes me feel a sense of belonging in this world
that looks down on dark and tortured souls
it eases off my loneliness
that sometimes makes me crumble
and leaves me in shambles

Posted on by pattytacuri

chili cheese fritos

me and emotionally supportive chip I had to give up
Daily writing prompt
What snack would you eat right now?
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If I had my gluttonous way
and I wasn’t counting the sodium content
in fucking everything
I’d devour an entire bag of chili cheese fritos
in between purchase orders and writing poems
I’d stress eat the fuck out of them
I’d even offer some to my friends
everyone needs to taste this salty and crunchy treat
everyone needs to get addicted to this devilish snack
that had me buying 4 bags at the time when it was on sale
me and Chili cheese fritos were the most epic poem,
a match made in consumerist heaven
until middle age and genetics brought on high blood pressure
and my addiction to chili cheese fritos had to end abruptly
so for now, I’ll write silly poems about how I can’t have the one thing
I once was addicted to and still crave
and hope that once I get my blood pressure under control
I’ll be reunited with my comfort snack
and we’ll be together again as I write, as I cry
as I lay on the couch binge watching
some depressing show on netflix

Posted on by pattytacuri

poetry: voodoo doll

I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

if I’m going to be a mess, might as well be a hot mess

does someone have a voodoo doll of me and stuck pins inside my head-
inside my heart-because lately I’m finding it hard to breathe
as my emotions consume and control me-
and I feel like the biggest failure and imposter for allowing it to happen
even though I still function well enough to mask
the mountain of turmoil and grief that’s currently residing me