Today is National Getting Over It day and I couldn’t think of a better way to celebrate it than by sharing my ANGRY AF playlist. A huge part for me getting over something tragic in my life is to get angry. And when I get angry, it’s almost like a volcano eruption. This is actually pretty healthy for me because I’ve felt that at times, anger has saved me from feeling all of my sadness at once which for me can get really overwhelming right away. I can even say that Anger has probably saved me from spiraling into an abyss of sadness that would be hard to crawl out of. In other words, anger has helped me survive whatever trauma has come my way. I used to be so ashamed of being angry because of how it would turn me into the most self absorbed and reactive person. I don’t feel that way anymore because I’ve learned how to better manage my anger. Instead of drinking or hooking with random dudes because I’m angry; I exercise or write while I listen to music. Most of the songs in this list are geared more towards someone going through a breakup because that is when my anger comes out the most. Thanks, BPD. Lol. In bold are my favorite songs from this list.
For the Brokenhearted: I’m ANGRY AF Edition (the only where you scream out the lyrics):
- FUCK YOU, GOODBYE-The Kid LAROI , Machine Gun Kelly
- SELFISH-The Kid LAROI
- SAME ENERGY- The Kid Laroi
- good 4 u-Olivia Rodrigo
- Cute Without the “E” (Cut from the Team)-Taking Back Sunday
- Sugar, We’re Going Down-Fall Out Boy
- Tell that Mick He Just Made My List of Things To Do Today-Fall Out Boy
- The Patron Saint of Liars and Fakes-Fall Out Boy
- traitor-Olivia Rodrigo
- Better Than Revenge -Taylor Swift
- Push-Matchbox Twenty
- You Oughta Know-Alanis Morissette
- We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together-Taylor Swift
- Stronger Than Me-Amy Winehouse
- Priest-Julia Michaels
- Death by a Thousand Cuts-Taylor Swift
- Closure-Taylor Swift
- Look What You Made Me Do-Taylor Swift
- Your Name Hurts-Hailee Steinfeld
- Great Romances of the 20th Century-Taking Back Sunday
- Lying Is The Most Fun a Girl Can Have Without Her Clothes Off- Panic! At the Disco
- BEST FOR ME-The Kid LAROI
- I Bet You Think About Me-Taylor Swift
- This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things-Taylor Swift
- Head Club-Taking Back Sunday
- Screaming Infidelities-Dashboard Confessional
- Ignore Me-Betty
- Sue Me-Sabrina Carpenter
Below are links to the playlist for your listening pleasure:
My relationship with music is probably the healthiest life long relationships I’ve ever had. I honestly don’t know what I would do without it. I listen to music as a way to process both the bad and good things that happen in my life. Music is one of my favorite coping mechanisms I have when I’m having strong emotions. I have a playlist for almost any kind of mood or emotion you might be having: Feeling Sexy- I have a playlist for that, Feeling like a Bad Bitch -I have a playlist for that, Feeling like Your Heart has been shattered in a million pieces and you’re gonna be alone forever- I have a playlist for that too. I like to listen to music first thing in the morning to get my day going. I also listen to it throughout the work day to break up the monotony of the day. Sometimes I even spontaneously serenade my coworkers with my horrendous singing-haha. Music has saved me on numerous occasions from the bad and intrusive thoughts I do have from time to time. I also love to listen to super loud music when I’m power walking and jogging. I listen to all kinds of music from gangsta rap to mainstream pop to boleros. My favorites artists are usually singer songwriters like Taylor Swift, The KID Laroi, Shakira, and Alejandro Sanz. I am super fortunate to be bilingual so I have a huge music catalogue to choose from. No matter what happens in my life, music has always been a way to either help calm me down when I’m angry or perk me up when I get in one of depressive moods. I will be sharing some of the playlists I listen to depending on my moods. Below is a link to posts about a few of my playlists.
I wrote this poem in fall of 2005 when I was feeling overwhelmed by my responsibilities of being a mother, a girlfriend, a student and a worker. As usual at that time, I took on too much and was trying to be everything to everyone. One trait of BPD that I’ve carried throughout the years is over extending myself sometimes to my detriment in order to make other people happy.
Feelings I can’t turn off
Quickly come in droves
Don’t know what to do
My options are few
Do I follow my gut?
And get away from this rut
Or do i stay here ?
And become what I fear;
A woman that settles
And lets others meddle
A woman with no mind
And with everything, she is fine
But can I turn off the real me?
And stay so unhappy