I reflect a lot on who I was, who I am, and who I will be- and Iβve reach the conclusion that Iβm proud of all three versions of me Constantly fighting my demons no matter how viciously they came after me Constantly reinventing and rebuilding myself even when the chaotic earthquakes of life broke me apart I reflect on the goddess, the beast in me who always refuses to give up who continues to get and keep going no matter how hard life tries to break me down
Whatβs something most people donβt know about you?
trying to avoid self-destruction. I do everything in my coping toolkit and since nothing works I just allow myself to feel-allow my inner critic to win for a bit I canβt keep fighting my negative thoughts – they need to be heard and acknowledge my fears who feed my anxiety telling me Iβm crazy and Iβll never be worthy of anyone and I listen and cry to my bully within I allow her to keep going until she starts getting tired and slowly, I shut her out at least for a while until another depressive spell happens
I’d love to ride a motorcycle for the first time in Oxapampa, Peru. It’s something that used to seem so scary to me but when I saw whole families riding motorcycles in Oxapampa in April on this year, I thought I want to do that. I’m sure I can make this happen on my next trip there.
I nurture my soil with love and everything that makes me smile Excitement stirs inside of me thinking of all my untapped potential and the poems and stories that are yet to be written The soil I step in is solid and I am grounded and calm Is this whatβs called Godβs love?
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind Todo Sobre Mi Madre Roma All About A Boy La Historia Oficial Sylvia Mujeres Al Borde De de un Ataque de Nervios Annie Hall Frida Fools Rush In
I plan my goals according to what I want to achieve and what will bring fulfillment and joy to my life. I keep a google doc of lifetime goals with lofty goals like owning property in the U.S and Peru and traveling to all 7 continents. Here’s a preview of it:
Get published in more online or print publications I will get a translation certification from Arizona University My Spanish will be more fluent than ever I will go to Oxapampa-4/2/2023 (goal accomplished, yay ME!) Travel to Asia Own property in Peru (preferably in Oxapampa -a house with farmland) Travel to Mexico (Frida Kahloβs house) Go to Montgomery, Alabama-Zelda Fitzgeraldβs house
I also have a short term goal list I make every year but also continue to revise them every time I start a new journal. Here’s a preview of it:
Improve on my craft
Improve my credit score
Budget way better (no take out, no amazon, no impulsive spending)
Limit drinking alcohol
Get a better second job or get a first job that pays me way more
Donβt get on stupid dating apps until after July 15th 2023-still not on any of them, yay me!
Donβt date -killing it by living a chaste life -8/18/2023
I want to add that I’m very intentional with my goals and when I start to feel stuck or stagnated in my life, I will revisit them and see which goals I’ve achieved and making progress on and which ones I need to work on. I think that having goals have given my life purpose and keeps me moving forward. Some years have harder than others to set goal, I remember in 2019 I had two goals: survive 2019, have more compassion for myself. So really, it doesn’t matter how many goals you have or what kind of goals they are, the only thing that matters is that they help you evolve and bring fulfillment to your life.
no, Susan or Ken, your ex wasn’t a narcissist, they just got tired of your bullshit. honestly, though, we need to stop arm chair diagnosing people with this word. it’s turning into a “catch all term” to make us feel better about ourselves when a relationship ends or we have a fallout with someone. I’ve been accused of it and I’ve accused others of it and it just made things worse. So, yeah, let’s stop using the word “narcissist” unless we are a legit mental health professional or we know for sure that person has been diagnosed as a narcissist.
when the world gets to be too much I block, I delete, I ignore I donβt want to waste my precious energy and time on anything that drains me, that robs me of my peace Iβve fought too hard to get to a place of serenity and I canβt allow anyone or anything to ruin my newfound reality of tranquility
The door of creativity has opened for me and thereβs no going back- Writing has become my new obsession- with it I let out years of my pent up frustration and rage I donβt even understand having a constant need to write every single thing my writerβs block is now a distant memory as my pen lets out all of my lifeβs stories of sorrow and joy