Posted on by pattytacuri

poetry: we all fuck up

I wrote this poem in April of 2023.

me in Oxapampa in April of 2023

we all fuck up from time to time and have to remind ourselves
we are not our worst mistakes, our terrible breakups, or our emotional relapses
to be human is to make mistakes and sometimes those mistakes will feel catastrophic
and that’s when your inner critic with the help of shame and guilt will step in
trying to make you feel like a piece of shit, worthless and useless when it comes to everything
acknowledge it, honor it if you have to but don’t get stuck in it
because this is not the entirety of you
this is just a small fraction of your being-
don’t get caught up in the worst of yourself-
remind yourself of your strength and the gifts that you bring into this world

Posted on by pattytacuri

poesía: tu reemplazo

here’s the english version of this poem:

poetry: your replacement

por mucho tiempo te odie por no ser un padre para el
pero después de tantos años veo que es mejor asi
porque tu reemplazo fue mucho mejor
le enseno a afeitarse, a manejar, y como ser un hombre
lleno de compasión e integridad
tu reemplazo todavía lo cuida
aunque el es un hombre hecho y derecho
tu reemplazo fue un buen padre
aunque el no lleva su sangre

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

poetry: always

I wrote this poem in April of 2023.

always never works out for me

Always has never been a friend of mine
because of the many lies I associate with it
I’ll always be here for you-
I’ll always love you
I’ll always be your friend
so now I never believe people who say always
Instead, I look at them with cynicism
And tell them, “that’s nice but I don’t believe you”

Posted on by pattytacuri

poetry: your replacement

this poem is inspired by a poem I wrote in 2006 about my first baby daddy.

he turned out just fine

He turned out fine without you in his life
I understand now that it was for the best
that you weren’t a part of his story
I no longer hold resentment for you
your replacement taught him
all of the important things
how to shave, how to drive
compassion and kindness
your replacement still checks up on him
even though he’s a grown
your replacement was never called Dad
but your replacement is the only father
he’s ever known

Posted on by pattytacuri

poesía: agradecida

here’s the English version of this poem:

Poetry: License

agobiada y frustrada desde una temprana edad
con la responsabilidad de mi maternidad
nunca tuve tiempo para apreciar la bendición que eran mis hijos
Nunca pude entender que mis hijos son el mejor regalos
que me pudo dar el universo
pero después de cumplir 40
y recibí un diagnóstico que cambiaría mi vida
Por fin pude sentir una gratitud verdadera por mis tres reyes
Por fin pude apreciar la felicidad que ellos me brindan
Por fin pude convertir mi historia de madre frustrada
a madre feliz y orgullosa

Posted on by pattytacuri

poetry: mortal

I wrote this poem in april of 2023.

blues clues

I almost drowned in a whirlpool of shame today because I made a mistake
because I’m an imperfect human
but I breathe in deeply self compassion and grace
and accept this is a small blunder in my life
and it shouldn’t take up too much space in my mind
And I needed to be a friend to myself
Understand I won’t always be flawless-
Afterall I’m only mortal

Posted on by pattytacuri

poetry: circle of fury

I wrote this poem in April of 2023.

pmdd is awful

Anger trickles in throughout my body
I didn’t get enough sleep
and the monster of PMDD is creeping in
I scream at the universe
for playing a certain song on the radio
And I get annoyed by everything
I hate being so sensitive and triggered
by the stupidest shit
I hate being mentally ill
I hate how the smallest change in my routine
causes me to spiral into nonsensical circle of fury