tus palabras me queman hasta que soy nada fui otra aventura más, otro tiempo divertido para alguien buscando huir de su monotonía no hay nada más que decir o hacer fingiré estar feliz qué decidiste regresar con ella mientras me hundo en un ciclo de autodestrucción y remordimientos
in first grade, I learned to be ashamed and embarrassed of who I was, and where I came from maybe the nuns were ignorant of the damage they were doing and since that time I’ve had identity issues for years, i gave up my language and my heritage in order to fit in- to have proximity to being an American but all it did was fuck up my identity and while I have forgiven the nuns for the damage done I have a hard time finding compassion for myself I have a hard time letting go the guilt For the pain I caused my family I have a hard time understanding I was just a kid desperately trying to fit in, to belong, to be accepted to conform of the standards of being American society fed me
getting to know the new you will be an adventure, and a risk worth taking even if we crash and burn once again because there’s no one else before or after who I loved more
The scared and anxious little girl and the insecure and clingy woman tug at me- I try to avoid them and lock them up in a box, but it never happens that way They refuse to go away when a trigger of trauma visits me And once again, I am lost in the alter ego I made up to protect myself the one who shows up in confidence and screams through her poetry but if I want to reach integration I need to allow the little girl and the insecure woman space to reside within me and honor them with powerful words of praise because they, too, were part of my strength and resilience through the many traumas It may feel painful at times-but for me to get to become a whole person and reach emotional maturity – I need to walk hand in hand with the ones who made me the powerful and confident woman I currently am
no se quien soy-esa es mi verdad todos tienen sus opiniones acerca de quién soy o quien debo ser Madres, hija, trabajadora, estudiante, hermana y novia son los papeles asignaron a mi- pero me siento una impostora, una fracasada en todos esos roles y sin saber quien soy debajo de las capas de estas identidades forzadas sobre mi persona- quien soy, quien soy, quien soy
Perdida en frustracion y desesperacion, no se que voy a hacer- Por fin, estaba tomando pasos para un futuro mejor pero de nuevo me encuentro con otro obstáculo por mi culpa porque qué diablos no mire bien antes de salir en la calle y en un santo amén perdi mi independencia
“This is your time” the moon goddess whispers to me in a dream she puts her hand on my shoulder and a jolt of magic spread throughout my body I stumble and almost fall- but catch myself in time to stand up-and feel my power rise within I am invincible, I am empowered, I am ready to fulfill my potential and claim my success
Quiero lo mejor para ti-porque te lo mereces, porque tu no pediste ser parte de este mundo pero la sigo regando con mis decisiones impulsivas con mis estupideces y no se como voy a salir de esta última atrocidad cometida que afectará el futuro de los dos