
my dream job would involve writing and traveling . I can imagine myself somewhere in some foreign country drinking coffee in some cafe where I write poetry as I’m people watching as I blast music in my ear buds.
here’s the English version of this poem:
Poetry: Andrew
cuando me preguntan acerca de mi primer amor
siempre pensarΓ© en el
aquel muchacho alto con los ojos marrones profundos
fue el primero que me trato con respecto y como una princesa
Nuestro cuento de amor fue casi como una pelΓcula de disney
fue algo mΓ‘gico y bello
pero algo tan bonito no puede sobrevivir en este mundo cruel
lleno de realidades que se tienen que enfrentar
aunque nos amΓ‘bamos con una pasiΓ³n hecho de fuego
no fue suficiente y nuestra llama de amor se apago
y nos fuimos por caminos diferentes
el hizo su vida y yo la mΓa
pero aunque han pasado mΓ‘s de 25 aΓ±os
cuando me pregunten que fue mi primer amor
siempre pensarΓ© en el
I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

a drunk driver hits an ambulance-
and there is outcry, an uproar over the craziness of it all
we all judge and hate the drunk driver without compassion
without looking in the mirror, without acknowledging
how most of us have made alcohol a staple,
a must need for celebration-
a must have for everyone no matter what social class youβre in
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Image via Pexels
I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

They laid him on my breast and told me,
βMeet your baby boyβ and I was in shock
the alien on top of me is mine?
this wasnβt supposed to be part of my adolescence
I’m only seventeen and some days I barely remember
to brush my teeth
and now I have this great responsibility
and his beady and angry eyes questions
as to why his comfort was disturb-he already hates the world
and I think , same, kid, same
I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

I go between contacts and glasses to fit my different personas-
in my contacts Iβm a pretty woman with makeup and a dress
I become the kind of woman men are nervous to be around
or get intimidated by
In glasses I donβt care to capture the male gaze or even mine
itβs when I work that second job or Iβm at home
itβs when I allow myself to just exist
not caring about the pressure to be attractive
or allow my social conditioning to take over
and tell me since Iβm this crazy, I need to be pretty, sexy, charming
to validate my existence
Lately I prefer my glasses, lately I want the freedom to just be
I remember being super excited and happy going on this bus ride because going to Oxapampa has been a dream of mine for quite some time. Oxapampa is the town my dad was born in and raised. When my dad talked about it, it always seemed picturesque and like something out of a fairy tale. I was also excited to meet my dad’s relatives (aunts and uncles) who helped raise him and the cousins who he played with. His relatives also seem to be larger than life characters who were genuine and good people according to my dad’s description of them.

when I think about my most memorable road trip, I think of my 10 hour bus ride I made from Lima to Oxapampa when I went to Peru last spring. It was memorable in a good way. The company we booked the trip with was wonderful and me and my son were mostly comfortable. So the trip to Oxapampa meant going up into a high altitude of 5951 ft above sea level from the 528 ft above sea level altitude in Lima. We were advised to consume coca leaves before going to prevent motion sickness so we went to the pharmacy and they gave us coca leave in pill form.

Our seats themselves were super comfortable and we could recline into an almost bed so we slept super comfortable. They also had screens where we could watch American movies dubbed in Spanish. One reason we were super comfortable was because we were on the upper deck of the bus which had more space for seats. Of course, we paid more for this V.I.P seating but damn , it was well worth it. Unfortunately and fortunately, it didn’t have WIFI so I just listened to my downloaded spotify playlist. There was a lot of Conan Gray and Taylor Swift I played on my way there. We went at night so we slept most of the way there but I did manage to capture some short videos of what I saw outside the video. We went through a lot of provinces and small towns. Here’s a short video of going through Pasco. This was shortly before we arrived.
I also want to mention that going on this bus ride was also kind of exhilarating because some of the roads are treacherous and narrow and sometimes we were going on terrain that was high. That meant if the driver lost control of the vehicle, we were SOL. Haha. It’s a good thing that a lot of drivers in Peru start driving between the ages of 12 and 14. There’s probably more I will write about this trip. So when we arrived, my great Aunt picked us up and we stayed at her air b&b on her property. Where we stayed had this rustic and magical vibe. I’ll probably write more about this trip that was life changing and healing in so many ways but for now, I’ll just answer the prompt for bloganuary about memorable roadtrips.


I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

music and lyrics have always given me a sense of home-
itβs how Iβve grown and evolved
Itβs how I learned to express my emotions
when I couldnβt make sense of anything
it fills my soul with love and creativity
it makes me feel a sense of belonging in this world
that looks down on dark and tortured souls
it eases off my loneliness
that sometimes makes me crumble
and leaves me in shambles

If I had my gluttonous way
and I wasnβt counting the sodium content
in fucking everything
Iβd devour an entire bag of chili cheese fritos
in between purchase orders and writing poems
Iβd stress eat the fuck out of them
Iβd even offer some to my friends
everyone needs to taste this salty and crunchy treat
everyone needs to get addicted to this devilish snack
that had me buying 4 bags at the time when it was on sale
me and Chili cheese fritos were the most epic poem,
a match made in consumerist heaven
until middle age and genetics brought on high blood pressure
and my addiction to chili cheese fritos had to end abruptly
so for now, Iβll write silly poems about how I canβt have the one thing
I once was addicted to and still crave
and hope that once I get my blood pressure under control
Iβll be reunited with my comfort snack
and weβll be together again as I write, as I cry
as I lay on the couch binge watching
some depressing show on netflix
I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

Jealousy is a normal emotion of the human condition
and shame shouldnβt be associated with it
everyone feels it
I used to run away from it
but now I sit with it
ask what it needs
Sometimes itβs me projecting an insecurity
or sometimes itβs a legit feeling
And thatβs okay too-
and jealousy doesnβt have to destroy anything
as long as I know how to acknowledge it
and donβt allow it to consume me

when it comes down to it, my mission in life is simple, it’s to be a good person and a good mom.βthat means being able to sleep at night with a clear conscious at night and knowing that I have done my best that day. that means giving my children the best of me most of the time.
I wrote this poem in January of 2023.

we won the national championship and everyone is so happy
and I feel nothing
I graduated from UGA but never felt included
so while Iβve pretended to care, I’ve always felt like an outcast
in a town who cares more about football and idiotic art
and bike lanes for woke and privilege white people
than for their poor and marginalized communities
In an ideal and magical universe, the one thing I would do differently if I had magical powers is turn into a potato. A potato that becomes a beautiful and most delicious plate of french fries bringing happiness and joy to some random person when they taste me. To become a potato would mean I wouldn’t have to be human and constantly exist which gets extremely exhausting and annoying at times. To become a potato means that for most of my life I would be surrounded by other potatoes, just chilling with absolutely no drama. It would be a swell life, I think.

However, I don’t live in an ideal and magical universe so I guess what I could do differently is to become more organized in my life. I have struggled with the curse of disorganized thoughts and a disorganized life since I can remember. I’ve tried and tried and have somewhat succeeded in some areas of my life in becoming more organized. For example, I have a routine that I try my best not to interrupt. It’s important to maintain this routine so I remain semblance of sanity for the most part. It’s hard because I’m pretty sure I have undiagnosed ADHD that’s followed me since I was a kid. That’s also why I struggled with disorganized thoughts which the silver lining in is that I get very creative when I’m in the thick of it. However, it’s also fucked with my sleep schedule which means I rely on sleepytime tea and meds to be able to go to sleep. Having disorganized thoughts also means I get overwhelmed and overstimulated at times in my environment if it’s chaotic. It turns my cortisol levels all the way up and I have to find a way to cope ASAP.βIt’s my flight or fight response turned on and I usually choose flight. Like for example, during my PMDD period (worst time when I have disorganized thoughts), I’m moody AF and if I get triggered by someone or something, while I may want to hurl insults or punch that person, most of the time I pause, assess, and go for a drive or a walk. Most of the time it’s a drive though because that seems to be the faster way I calm down.

This post is a perfect example of my struggle with organization. I went from talking about wanting to be a potato to talking about disorganization to my PMDD. This fucking struggle is too real. Anyways, to answer this question, I could make more lists of shit I need to get done, schedule my breakdowns more often when I can (haha), make more time to meditate and relax (Idk how this will happened, I can’t even remember ever taking a nap in Kindergarten). It’s starting to feel like a hopeless situation but Idk maybe I’ll find the answer in a book. Who knows? Crazier things have happened. Also, I’m open to suggestions.


I never asked to be born, much less to be a mosaic of trauma, insanity, and creativity
I prayed many times to be normal-to be someone else
but the day came when I had to embrace the masterpiece of duality and insanity that I am
to understand not everyone will understand me
to do the best I am with the deck of cards Iβve been handed
12/13/23
I wrote this poem in December of 2022.

I want the transparency of your being-
the stuff you wonβt show anyone else
the secrets youβre afraid to share
I want your vulnerability in our intimacy
Even if you think itβs messy or cringy
I promise I wonβt judge and there will be no need
for sorries
now that Iβm falling for you
I want to know every part of you
I wonβt do what the others have done to you or me
Iβll stay because love means loyalty and honesty