poetry: fast forward

I wrote this poem in June of 2023.

so pretty but so unhinged and insecure

I want to fast forward to the version of me
who’s not always in her head
who’s not struggling to regulate her emotions
who’s not so fucking jaded and negative
when it comes to love
who’s not terrified of change
who doesn’t take things personally
I know, I know
I shouldn’t wish to be anyone else
and fully live and enjoy this version of myself
but lately, I’m having a hard time moving on
to the next level of my life
everything feels so comfortable
everything feels so peaceful
I’m scared to make any waves and return to chaos
even if I know it’s necessary to get to YOU
the future version of me who embraces change
with courage and bravery
Only this version of can dream of

poetry: warzone

I wrote this poem in June of 2022.

you can go your own way-fleetwood mac

I’ve walked through the warzone of my love life long enough to know
when a bomb is about to explode (when I fall of some guy’s dream girl altar)
It’s a minefield full of suppressed feelings
consequences of accommodating to a man’s ego
And I’ll tread ever so carefully
I don’t want to be alone, I just want to be loved,
I’ll bend and bend until you call me Gumby
Except I’m not and then I’ll snap and another bomb will go off
“You’re crazy,” you’re dangerous” “ I don’t recognize you”
all for expressing my feelings and wanting respect and dignity

poetry: small town

I wrote this poem in June of 2023.

me with my emotionally supportive squad who helped me fill out my divorce paperwork- Shoutout to Meg, who took tacos for payment as she filled out most of it and gave me advice…

you’re my small town I’ve outgrown but am afraid to leave
no one seems to understand this
they’re concerned you’re holding me back
they’re concerned staying with you stiffens my dreams
and while I know they want what’s best for me
and I agree with most of what they say
How do I explain to them, it’s more complicated
than I’ve made it out to be
while you are hard to live with
life without you feels almost empty
and while it’s the right thing to do to end our marriage
so we can move forward as a family
it’s still hard to imagine a beginning without you

poetry: are we having fun yet?

I wrote this poem in June of 2022.

Be careful who you're loyal too
My lack of common sense left being me loyal to people who never deserved it..

Our story needed to end and today feels like the definitive ending
You’ll never give me the consistency in love I need
And I’ll never birth the baby you wanted
We’re too different, we’re too alike
and I sarcastically and constantly ask myself “are we having fun yet”
Sometimes we did but most of the time I never understood where I stood
So block me and , forget me
You’ll never be enough for me and I’ll never be enough for you

poetry: road to somewhere

I wrote this poem in June of 2022.

I learned my worth that summer

Got two hours of sleep last night
But I still woke up with excitement in my bones
Excited about a future without you
Excited that you’re really gone from my life
Because while I loved you and had many good times
You were never going to change, and neither was I
We were on the road to nowhere
And now that we’re forever apart
We’re on the road to somewhere
Somewhere that gives us space to grow
Somewhere without the pain and drama we caused each other
Somewhere that brings us the peace and love we need
to be authentic

poetry: not easy

I wrote this poem in May of 2023.

feeling like a Goddess in my favorite bikini

this didn’t come easily but I finally love myself to the moon and back
it was a hard process after so many years of self loathing
and drowning in my insecurities
I was my own worst enemy constantly focusing and scrutinizing
Every single one of my imperfections
Ugh, I’m too dumb or too fat or too old
Never did I see myself as a masterpiece of God’s making until this year
and now I’ve grown to love and accept every version of myself
because despite of all of my mistakes and flaws
I’m still worthy of all the love in the world

poetry: comfortable

I wrote this poem in March of 2023.

so comfortable I take pics like these….it’s me and my thigh high boots against the world..lol

Finally comfortable in my skin
I’m no longer afraid to show off my majestic beauty
my curves comes one of the seven wonders of the world
and my face is a mosaic of my colonizer and indigenous ancestry
and now I grace the world with my beauty
posting endless selfies in various poses
some people may find it narcissistic
but if you possessed my goddess beauty
would you try to hide it?

From Overwhelmed to In Control:Techniques for Managing Everyday Stress

From Overwhelmed to In Control:
Techniques for Managing Everyday Stress by Julia Mitchell

Photo by Freepik

In today’s fast-paced world, stress has become an unwelcome companion for many of us, often creeping into our lives when we least expect it. Whether it stems from our professional responsibilities, personal relationships, or the myriad of challenges that daily life presents, understanding and managing stress is crucial for maintaining our mental, emotional, and physical well-being. This guide from Life on the BPD aims to shed light on the common stressors that pervade our lives, offering insights on how to identify them and practical strategies for handling these pressures effectively. 

Understand Your Stress

Carving out time for reflection is crucial for identifying the root causes of your stress. By setting aside moments each day or week to acknowledge instances when you felt overwhelmed, you can gain insights into what triggers your stress responses. This understanding is foundational, as it guides you toward effective stress management strategies. Reflecting on your experiences not only sheds light on the sources of your stress but also helps you recognize patterns and triggers, making it easier to address them moving forward.

Embrace Mindfulness

Mindfulness serves as a stabilizing force amidst the tumultuous waves of stress. Practices such as deep breathing exercises and meditation offer refuge by anchoring you in the present moment. This focus on the here and now acts as a buffer against the chaos of stress, providing a sense of calm and clarity. By integrating mindfulness into your daily routine, you can develop a resilient mindset that is better equipped to handle stress, ensuring that you remain centered and balanced even in challenging times.

Establish Boundaries for Stress Reduction

Setting clear boundaries is essential in safeguarding your mental health. By defining limits in work, relationships, and personal commitments, you can prevent stress from encroaching on your well-being. This practice helps in managing expectations and commitments, ensuring that your time and energy are spent on what truly matters. Establishing boundaries empowers you to navigate life with more ease and less stress, promoting a healthier and more balanced lifestyle.

Lean Into Physical Activity

Physical activity is a potent tool in the fight against stress. Engaging in exercises, whether it’s a brisk walk, yoga, or a session at the gym, can significantly relieve tension. The physical exertion releases endorphins, improving your mood and reducing stress. Regular physical activity not only benefits your physical health but also acts as a therapeutic release for emotional and psychological stress, contributing to overall well-being.

Explore Alternative Stress Relief Methods

Diverse approaches to stress management can offer fresh perspectives and solutions. Techniques such as yoga, acupuncture, and guided imagery provide unique pathways to relaxation and mental clarity. 

  • Yoga: Practicing yoga combines physical postures, breathing exercises, and meditation to reduce stress and enhance overall well-being. Yoga helps release tension in the body, while the meditative aspects can improve mental clarity and reduce anxiety.
  • Acupuncture: This ancient Chinese medicine technique involves inserting thin needles into specific points on the body to balance energy flow. It can help reduce stress by promoting relaxation, decreasing the body’s production of stress hormones, and improving sleep quality.
  • THCa (Tetrahydrocannabinolic Acid): THCa, a non-psychoactive precursor to THC found in available forms of THCa in raw cannabis, has been shown to have anti-inflammatory and neuroprotective effects. Its potential to reduce stress comes from its ability to modulate the body’s endocannabinoid system, which plays a key role in regulating mood and stress responses.
  • Ashwagandha: This herb, used in Ayurvedic medicine for centuries, is known for its adaptogenic properties, helping the body manage stress more effectively. Ashwagandha can lower cortisol levels, enhance brain function, and improve sleep patterns, making it a powerful tool for combating stress and anxiety.

Exploring these alternatives can uncover new methods to alleviate stress, catering to individual preferences and needs. By being open to different therapies, you can find the most effective and enjoyable ways to maintain your mental well-being, enhancing your ability to cope with stress.

The Importance of Social Support

Sharing your struggles with stress can be incredibly therapeutic. Opening up to trusted individuals creates a support network that can offer comfort and advice. This act of vulnerability can illuminate both the sources of your stress and potential solutions, making the burden easier to bear. The support of friends, family, or professionals not only provides emotional relief but also strengthens your resilience, making you better equipped to manage stress.

As we journey through the complexities of life, embracing a holistic approach to managing stress can lead to a more fulfilling and balanced existence. By identifying the sources of our stress and exploring both traditional and alternative methods for addressing them, we empower ourselves to navigate life’s ups and downs with grace and resilience. Remember, managing stress is not about eliminating challenges from our lives but about enhancing our ability to cope with them. With patience, practice, and persistence, we can transform our relationship with stress, turning our experiences into opportunities for growth and self-discovery. 

Join the journey at Life on the BPD, where trauma is turned into triumph. Dive deep into stories that resonate, learn from shared experiences, and become part of a community that embraces growth and healing.