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poetry: outgrowing the story

I wrote this poem in November of 2023.

real sound advice

the repetitive compliments, the gross flattery about your looks
no longer works on you-
You’re one “hey beautiful” from vomiting the contents of your lunch
all of these men state the obvious-you’re pretty
And they think it’s a way to get to closer to you
but you scream, “ew” and block them
it’s nothing against them, you just no longer have the luxury
of time to waste it on this type of nonsense to even think
about entertaining them
you’re outgrown that story

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

poetry: release

I wrote this poem in November of 2020.

me in another lifetime

Releasing my fears
of the unknowns
and the what ifs
to fulfill my life’s purpose
is a challenging

I refuse to lie down
in a defeatist mode
in comfortable mediocrity
stagnant in a suburban reality

So I release my fears
to truly reach my potential
to prove to others
they were wrong
but mostly to prove
to myself that I was wrong
and I’m worthy
and I’m enough

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

poetry: shame

I wrote this poem in November of 2023.

this little girl deserved better

my past is clouded in shame over secrets
that were never my responsibilities
or a burden to bear
and all to keep up appearances
that we were a normal and happy family
and normal and happy families
don’t talk about addiction or mental illness

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

poetry: chains

I wrote this poem in November of 2023.

I always manage to find a way to survive

The invisible chains of my mental illness try to take away my joy
and enthusiasm but I shake off my chains
and live as fully as I can
Despite my anxiety,
Despite my depression,
Despite my BPD trying to grab hold of me
I no longer allow my inner demons rob me
of the goodness that universe has to offer me

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

poetry: me and my trauma

I wrote this poem in November of 2023.

the damn trauma

I hold hands with my trauma and show her off to everyone
most people look at her with curiosity
some people are horrified
my family cringes and and whispers to me,
“it’s embarrassing, showing her as some kind of trophy”
I get mad and flip everyone off
and me and my trauma link arms and skip on our way
to share her story and create drama and chaos
who cares if no one understands our process
of healing and recovery by sharing our story

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

poetry: the thin veil

I wrote this poem in November of 2023.

so much strength passed on to me

today I feel the presence of my ancestors more than ever
they praise me for breaking through the bullshit
that society tried to sell about what it means
to be a woman and mother-
they love me despite my many sins and that mistakes I’ve made
they scold me when I call myself a monster or an atrocity
they encourage me to continue on my path
they tell me to trust my intuition more
and to take more risks with my art and in my life
it’s a disservice to myself to doubt my creativity
this only hinders me from fully expressing myself
and keeps me from being authentic and honest
when I share mine and their stories

Posted on by pattytacuri

poetry: it ends with me

I wrote this poem in October of 2023.

me at night of spite in October of 2023

I come from a line of women who were never afforded
the privilege of telling their stories and speaking out their truths
they simply accommodated and according to the expectations
from their parents and husbands
they had no choice but to shut up, obey, breed, and stay
like docile animals whose spirits are beaten out of them
and with each poem, each blog post, each social media post
I feel a part of them heal because I will be the last in my lineage
to have followed suit and the first one to break out of the toxic narrative
where women should only be seen and not heard
where women should be limited by their gender
where women are only good for one thing
I’m the red herring, the hair out of place,
la malcriada-
who’ll scream as much and as loud as I have to
to tell mine and their stories
even as my family cringes
and accuses me of being dramatic and crazy
because to not do so would be a disservice to them,
to me, and to future generations

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

inner child

summer child
Daily writing prompt
What’s something you believe everyone should know.
View all responses

lean into your inner child, let your spirit once again
be filled with awe and wonder
forget society’s rules that tells you to act your age
to control yourself,
who determines these stupid conventions and norms
anyways
sing out loud at the table, dance in your office
tell a stranger you’re glad they exist,
run in a field of flowers and giggle
lean into your inner child, let your spirit once again
be filled with awe and wonder

Posted on by pattytacuri · 2 Comments

poetry:beneath

I wrote this poem in October of 2022.

one day
the things people don’t say

Beneath the fallen leaves lies my footprints
and the footprints of lives unknown
on roads taken with regrets
Beneath the fallen leaves lies the stories from the trash
not picked up-a used condom here, a hair tie there
a letter lost
Beneath the fallen leaves lies everything unsaid
and tears that have fallen

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

poetry: bleak and rainy days

I wrote this poem in October of 2021.

live in the present
live in the present

Bleak and rainy days
used to make me sad
and squeeze the life out of me
But now
I think of all the
sunshines and rainbows
in my life
three souls I gave birth to
the friends who accept me
my parents who continue
to be loving and nurturing
my coworkers whom I’ve
Shared a pandemic war with
But mostly, the new version
of myself who might feel
despair and sadness on some
days but keeps going
This new version
that loves herself fully
for once is enough

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

poetry: ivory tower problems

I wrote this poem in October of 2023.

a collage of me in my kroger garb

I’m starting to radically accept someone like me
will always be judged differently from my peers
it doesn’t matter how many degrees I have-
how much I code switch to fit in-
it will never be enough to be truly accepted
so I’ll smile and nod while they complain
about ivory tower problems
while I roll my eyes inside my mind-
man, I really wish I had your problems Susan
but I got to go to my second job now

Posted on by pattytacuri · 1 Comment

poetry: pretentious uber driver

I wrote this poem in October of 2023.

maybe it was the outfit that made my uber driver nervous

I couldn’t tell if you were nervous or just an asshole
trying to impress me with your knowledge
of shakespeare that came off as mansplaning
which was so cringe and annoying
since I told you I have a degree in English
and I had taken two Shakespeare classes
maybe you didn’t take me seriously
because of how short my dress was
or my thigh-high boots caught you off guard
is it some sort of abomination for me
to be smart and smoking hot
that men treat me like I’m a bimbo
they need to save or mansplain shit to
maybe I should start using it to my advantage
play the role of “pretty woman”
observe how much men underestimate me
and write poetry about it
and make it blog content a year later

Posted on by pattytacuri

poetry: not promised tomorrow

I wrote this poem in September of 2022.

just me and my entire universe

we’re not promised tomorrow, so we must make the best of our todays-
making community with our friends, reconnecting with our roots
loving our children with a loud fervor
we’re not promised tomorrow, so we must appreciate
everything we have
the legs that take us on walks and runs
the creativity that flows from our minds
the laughter shared with loved ones

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poetry: complete

I wrote this poem in September of 2022.

about to make a life changing trip

I longed and longed and longed to feel whole
until I planted my feet on the soil I was born on
until I breathed the air my parents and ancestors inhaled
until I tasted flavors from almost a lifetime ago
I longed and longed and longed to feel whole
until I returned to my homeland
and it was the piece of the puzzle found
I needed to finally complete me

Posted on by pattytacuri

Poetry: gratitude

I wrote this poem in September of 2022.

look at that Goddess, very awkward, very full of herself

gratitude taste like mami’s sopa de pollo
gratitude smells like my lover’s cologne
gratitude feels like a warm hug from my son
gratitude sounds like my sister’s car in my driveway
gratitude looks like me looking at the Goddess in the mirror